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>>>
Subj:     Cat2 Jokes
                 (Includes 93 jokes and articles, 18952,30,cf,vYT2a,17)
 
 

          Click "Here" for Cats-Supp


Luck Cat
from
Abdul's Animation Gallery
Includes the following:  5 Kittens In A Basket - Photo (S923 in Supp)
.........................Happy Inside - IKEA Cats Advert (S908 in Supp)
.........................My Daughter And Her Cat (S859 in Supp)
.........................Cat Opens Freezer To Steal Fish Sticks - Video (S798-Supp)
.........................Cravendale Milk Ad - Cats With Thumbs - Video (S739 - Sup)
.........................The Difference Between Dogs And Cats (S56 in Supp)
.........................Why The Dog Left - Photo (S399b)
.........................Cat With New Bionic Back Legs - Video (S702 in Supp)
.........................A Little History From the 1500s (in Supp)
.........................Stanley And Gabriel - Video (S693b in Supp)
.........................Trip to the Veterinary Clinic (S748 in Supp)
.........................Standing Cat Videos I And II (S691b in Supp)
.........................Mission Impossible Cats - Video (S689b in Supp)
.........................
.........................Cat Sledding - Video (S952)
.........................New York Cat In Winter (S681)
.........................Scuba Diving Cat - Video (S503b)
.........................Man Gets Rid Of Wife's Cat (S485c)
.........................Cat Runs In As Couple Goes Out (S217, S849)
.........................Ripley's Believe It Or Not! (S635b)
.........................Nude Husband Fixes Garbage Disposal (S211, S470)
.........................Stray Cat Strut (S195)
.........................Non Sequitur Sunday Comic Strip (S919d)
.........................Owner's Guide For Cats (S164)
.........................Christmas Cat Poetry (S152)
.........................If Cats Wrote Haiku (S148)
.........................Dead Cat Stories 262b
.........................Cat In A Fish Bowl - Video (S520b)
.........................Cat Quotations (S95)
                         Short Cat Jokes and Facts
..............................The Box - Simon's Cat - Video (S897 in Supp)
..............................Where is the CAT?????? (S787 in Supp)
..............................Simon's Cat In 'Snow Business' - Video (S787 in Supp)
..............................Cat Playing The Shell Game - Video (S751 in Supp)
..............................Laser Cat Bowling - Video (S736 in Supp)
..............................
..............................Stray Cats (S659)
..............................Seeing Eye Cat (S593b)
..............................Free To Good Home (S587b)
..............................Mischievous Cats - Video (S585b)
..............................Two Faced Kitten - Video (S576)
..............................Kitten Cannon - Game (S570b)
..............................Talking Cats - Video (S570b)
..............................Kitten And Bird Are Best Friends - Video (S565)
..............................Cat Looses It's Tail (S564c)
..............................Simon's Cat In "Wake-Up" - Video (S560b)
..............................Refrigerator Magnet (S558c)
..............................Blind Cat Cartoon (S544b)
..............................Look Daddy - Kittens (S508b)
..............................Cat Scan Cartoon (S380)
..............................How Cats Sleep - Cartoon (S404)
..............................Free Cat (S501c)
..............................Hairball Bowling - Game (S484b)
..............................Stuff on Cats - Cat Lovers Site (S452)
..............................20 Ways To Have Fun With A Pussy (S448b)
..............................Farm Cats - Picture (S427b)
..............................Clear Screen - SWF (S420b)
..............................Mouse Cake (S420b)
..............................Clay Kitten Shooting - Game (S372b)
..............................Many Cute Kitten Photos (S372b)
..............................Mutts Comic Strip (S364b)
..............................Pussy Warmer (S364)
..............................Virtual Cat Maukie - Game (S344b, S446)
..............................Fred the cat... (S283b)
..............................Cat And Mice Riddle (S253)
..............................Cat And Mice Riddle II (S299b, S549)
..............................Cat Hair Riddle (S239b)

============================================================Top
Subj:     Cat Sledding (S952d)
          Posted by AaronsAnimals
          From: Jenny Yandell on Facebook
 Source: http://www.youtube.com/embed/lceSo10_d9Q
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.......Click 'HERE' to see this epic, eleven second video.
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Top
Subj:     New York Cat In Winter (S681)
          From: LABLaughsClean on 1/27/2010

 My aunt's neighbor in New York had a beautiful black cat,
 named Felix, who spent his days outside and came indoors
 at night. One cool October evening, he disappeared. The
 neighbor searched for him in vain for several days. The
 following spring, however, Felix reappeared, looking
 healthy and clean. She figured he's been out sowing his
 wild oats. Everything was back to normal until that
 autumn, when Felix disappeared again. The next spring,
 he returned. Perplexed, my aunt's friend began asking
 neighbors for clues. Finally, she rang the bell of an
 older couple who lived down the street. "A black cat?"
 the woman said. "Oh, yes! My husband and I hated to
 see him out in the cold, so we bought a cat carrier.
 We take him to Florida with us every winter."

Top
Subj:     Scuba Diving Cat (S503b,d)
          From: auntiegah on 9/12/2006
 Source: http://www.youtube.com/embed/s2hTJP8fUyY

 This video show a cat and a dog scuba diving in a pool
 and they enjoy it.  Clicking 'HERE'. to see this amazing
 video clip.
 

Top
Subj:     Man Gets Rid Of Wife's Cat (S485c)
          From: From: LABLaughsClean on 5/2/2006

 A man absolutely hated his wife's cat and decided to get rid
 of him one day by driving him 20 blocks from his home and
 leaving him at the park.  As he was getting home, the cat
 was walking up the driveway.

 The next day he decided to drive the cat 40 blocks away.  He
 put the beast out and headed home.  Driving back up his
 driveway, there was the cat!

 He kept taking the cat further and further and the cat would
 always beat him home.  At last he decided to drive a few miles
 away, turn right, then left, past the bridge, then right again
 and another right until he reached what he thought was a safe
 distance from his home and left the cat there.

 Hours later the man calls home to his wife: "Jen, is the cat
 there?"

 "Yes," the wife answers, "why do you ask?"

 Frustrated, the man answered, "Put that stupid cat on the
 phone, I'm lost!  And need directions!"

Top
Subj:     Cat Runs In As Couple Goes Out (S217, S849)
          From: gordonschuk on 2/1/2008
      and From: CKButch4Femme on 4/19/4013

 A couple was dressed and ready to go out for the evening.
 They turned on a night light, turned the answering machine
 on the phone line, covered their pet parakeet and put the
 cat in the backyard.  They phoned the local cab company
 and requested a taxi.  The taxi arrived and the couple
 opened the front door to leave their house.

 The cat they had put out into the yard scoots back into
 the house.  They don't want the cat shut in the house
 because "she" always tries to eat the bird.  The wife
 goes out to the taxi while the husband goes inside to
 get the cat.

 The cat runs upstairs, the man in hot pursuit.  The wife
 doesn't want the driver to know the house will be empty.
 She explains to the taxi driver that her husband will be
 out soon.  "He's just going upstairs to say goodbye to
 my mother."

 A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab. "Sorry
 I took so long," he says, as they drive away.  "Stupid
 bitch was hiding under the bed.  Had to poke her with a
 coat hanger to get her to come out!  Then I had to wrap
 her in a blanket to keep her from scratching me.  But it
 worked.  I hauled her fat ass downstairs and threw her
 out into the back yard!"

Top
(S635b)
     by John Graziano on 2/8/2009
 Source: http://comics.com/ripleys_believe_it_or_not/
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Top
Subj:     Nude Husband Fixes Garbage Disposal (S211, S470)
          From: thebartend on 2/13/2001 and 1/17/2006

 Calling in sick to work makes me uncomfortable. No matter
 how legitimate my illness, I always sense my boss thinks
 I am lying.

 On one occasion, I had a valid reason, but lied anyway
 because the truth was too humiliating.  I simply mentioned
 that I had sustained a head injury and I hoped I would
 feel up to coming in the next day.

 By then, I could think up a doozy to explain the bandage
 on my crown.

 The accident occurred mainly because I conceded to my
 wife's wishes to adopt a cute little kitty.  Initially
 the new acquisition was no problem, but one morning I
 was taking my shower after breakfast when I heard my
 wife, Deb, call out to me from the kitchen. "Ed!  The
 garbage disposal is dead.  Come reset it."

 "You know where the button is," I protested through the
 shower.  "Reset it yourself!"

 "I'm scared!" she pleaded.  "What if it starts going
 and sucks me in?" (Pause) "C'mon, it'll only take a
 second."

 So out I came, dripping wet and buck naked, hoping to
 make a statement about how her cowardly behavior was
 not without consequence.  I crouched down and stuck
 my head under the sink to find the button.

 It is the last action I remember performing.  It
 struck without warning, without respect to my circum-
 stances.  Nay, it wasn't a hexed disposal drawing me
 into its gnashing metal teeth.  It was our new kitty,
 clawing playfully at the dangling objects she spied
 between my legs.

 She had been poised around the corner and stalked  me
 as I took the bait under the sink.  At precisely the
 second I was most vulnerable, she leapt at the toys
 I unwittingly offered and snagged them with her needle-
 like claws.  I lost all rational thought to control
 orderly bodily movements, while rising upwardly at a
 violent rate of speed,  with the full weight of a
 kitten hanging from my masculine region.

 Wild animals are sometimes faced with a "fight or
 flight" syndrome.  Men, in this predicament, choose
 only the "flight" option.  Fleeing straight up, the
 sink and cabinet bluntly impeded my ascent; the impact
 knocked me out cold.  When I awoke, my wife and the
 paramedics stood over me.

 Having been fully briefed by my wife, the paramedics
 snorted as they tried to conduct their work while
 suppressing their hysterical laughter.

 At the office, colleagues tried to coax an explanation
 out of me.  I kept silent, claiming it was too painful
 to talk.  "What's the matter, cat got your tongue?"

 If they had only known.

Top
Subj:     Stray Cat Strut (S195)
          From: JOKE-OF-THE-DAY.com on 10/25/2000

 Stray cats will not be fed.

 Stray cats will not be fed anything except dry cat food
 moistened with a little milk.

 Stray cats will not be fed anything except dry cat food
 moistened with warm milk, yummy treats and leftover fish
 scraps.

 Stray cats will not be petted, played with or picked up
 and cuddled unnecessarily.

 Stray cats that are petted, played with, picked up and
 cuddled will absolutely not be given a name.

 Stray cats with or without a name will not be allowed
 inside the house at any time.

 Stray cats allowed inside will not be permitted to jump up
 on or sharpen their claws on the furniture.

 Stray cats will be permitted on furniture but must sharpen
 claws on new $114.99 sisal rope scratching post with three
 perches.

 Stray cats will sleep outside.

 Stray cats will sleep in the garage.

 Stray cats will sleep in the house, but not in our bed.

 Stray cats will sleep in our bed, but not under the covers.

 Stray cats will not play on the desk.

 Stray cats will not play on the desk near the computer.

 Stray cats are forbidden to walk on the computer keyboard
 on the desk when the human is using it.

 Stray cats will not CJDJBEFUBEDBVKJB KNCX ZXMNLJN!

Top
Subj:     Non Sequitur Sunday Comic Strip (S919d)
          By Wiley Miller on 8/24/2014
 Source: http://www.gocomics.com/nonsequitur/2014/08/24
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.Click 'HERE' to see our super hero battle a giant black panther.

Top
Subj:     Owner's Guide For Cats (S164)
          From: JOKE-OF-THE-DAY.com on 3/20/00

 Cats are beautiful, sophisticated, intelligent creatures.
 And with a little love and caring, they can keep a human
 being alive for upwards of seventy to eighty years.  If
 you follow these simple instructions, you can have your
 human housetrained in no time.

 CLEANLINESS:  For some reasons, humans seem to enjoy
 immersing themselves in running water.  Attempts to get
 humans to lick themselves clean have proven interesting,
 if unproductive.

 COMMUNICATION:  Humans are unable to speak a proper
 language.  Therefore, you should communicate a point
 loudly, repeatedly, and if at all possible, at about
 three in the morning. Any attempts at human-to-cat
 communication can be dealt with by simply ignoring it
 until it stops.

 FEEDING:  Morning feeding should start promptly when
 your human is fast asleep, preferably three or four
 minutes before the alarm is supposed to go off.
 Recommended methods of waking your human include:
 sitting on its face, screaming in its ear, and biting
 its hair.

 MATING:  Human mating behavior is fascinating.
 Unfortunately, humans tend to get easily spooked by
 prolonged study of courtship rituals, and resort to
 shoe-throwing behavior.

 TOILET TRAINING:  A human's natural tendency is to not
 change your litter box.  Although experts in human
 behavior believe it can be attributed to the "laziness
 reflex," this can be easily corrected through what is
 called "shoe therapy."  Just remember that a human
 shoe looks a lot like a human toilet, and you should
 be fine.

 Following these simple tips is the first step towards
 a long and productive cat/human relationship.

Top
Subj:     Christmas Cat Poetry (S152)
          From: KMacinty on 12/29/1999

 A little something for those of you who are
 sharing the holidays with your feline betters.

 Hark! the hungry kitties cry,
 feed us now before we die.
 You don't know how long it's been
 If you don't feed us it's a sin
 Harken to our kitty tears!
 We have not been fed in years.
 Hark! the hungry kitties cry,
 feed us now before we die.
 

 God rest ye merry gentlemen, sit down and make a lap
 And sit for seven hours so we can take a nap.
 There is no higher cause to serve than to sit and
    stroke our fur.
 Oh! tidings of kneading and purrs
 Oh! tidings of kneading and purrs

Top
Subj:     If Cats Wrote Haiku (S148)
          From: gheckman on 12/01/1999

 Haiku is a very structured form of poetry.  Each haiku
 consists of three lines: five syllables, seven syllables,
 five syllables.  Rhyming is not required.
 

          If Cats Wrote Haiku

         You never feed me.
         Perhaps I'll sleep on your face.
         That will sure show you.

         You must scratch me there!
         Yes, above my tail!
         Behold, elevator butt.

         The rule for today
.........Touch my tail, I shred your hand.
         New rule tomorrow.

         In deep sleep hear sound
         cat vomit hair ball somewhere
         will find in morning.

         Grace personified.
         I leap into the window.
         I meant to do that.

         Blur of motion, then-
         silence, me, a paper bag.
         What is so funny?

         The mighty hunter
         Returns with gifts of plump birds-
         Your foot just squashed one.

         You're always typing.
         Well, let's see you ignore me
         sitting on your hands.

         My small cardboard box.
         You cannot see me if I
         can just hide my head.

         Terrible battle.
         I fought for hours.  Come and see!
         What's a 'term paper'?

         Kitty likes plastic
         Confuses for litter box
         Don't leave tarp around

         Small brave carnivores
         Kill pine cones and mosquitoes
        Fear vacuum cleaner.

         I want to be close
         to you.  Can I fit my head
         inside your armpit?

         Wanna go outside.
         Oh, no!  Help!  I got outside!
         Let me back inside!

         Oh my!  Big One
         has been trapped by newspaper!
         Cat to the rescue!

         Humans are so strange.
         Mine lies still in bed, then screams
         My claws are not that sharp.

         Cats meow out of angst
         "Thumbs!  If only we had thumbs!
         We could break so much!"

         The Big Ones snore now
         Every room is dark and cold
         Time for "Cup Hockey"

         We're almost equals
         I purr to show I love you
         Want to smell my butt?

Top
Subj:     Dead Cat Stories (S262b)
          From: Ossama's Laugh on 6/28/98
      and From: mombear1 on 2/4/2002

 Out of the mouths of babes comes the Dead Cat Test, a true
 story.  A kindergarten pupil told his teacher he'd found a
 cat.  She asked if it was dead or alive. "Dead," she was
 informed.

 "How do you know?", she asked.

 "Because I pissed in his ear and it didn't move," said the
 child innocently.

 "You did WHAT?!?", the teacher squealed in surprise.

 "You know," explained the boy, "I leaned over and went
 'pssst' in his ear, and he didn't move."

 ----------------------------------------------------------

 Mr. Franklin was unable to keep from running over the cat
 as it bolted through a bush and darted in front of his car.
 Picking up the poor limp animal, he carried it to the house
 and rang the bell. A white-haired old woman answered the
 door.

 "I'm sorry," said Mr. Franklin, "but I'm afraid I've run
 over your cat. I'd like to replace it."

 "Certainly," the woman replied. "How are you at catching
 mice?"

 -----------------------------------------------------------

 Mrs. Pepperwinkle was devastated when her cat Mary expired.
 She wanted to give it a proper funeral, but both the
 Catholic and Protestant churches in her neighborhood
 refused to bury a cat.

 In desperation, the woman turned to the synagogue and
 asked the rabbi if he would say a few words at the cat's
 funeral.

 "Mrs. Pepperwinkle," the rabbi said, "for one thing, we
 do not believe in burying animals.  For another, you're
 not even Jewish."

 "I intend to donate a half million dollars in Mary's name
 to any house of worship which will accept her," the woman
 interrupted.

 "..on the other hand, I do believe the cat is Jewish..."

 ----------------------------------------------------------

 The football stadium was infested with cats, but no one
 minded.  They kept the mice away.  One day, a cat chased
 a mouse up the scoreboard and over the side.  The mouse
 was able to hold on, but the cat was not.

 As it happened, Abramowicz was going out for a pass at
 just that moment.  Noticing the cat plummeting toward the
 field, he poured on the speed, extended his arms, and
 caught it to his chest, the crowd, watching the incredible
 display, jumped to their feet and cheered.

 And as he entered the end zone, the ecstatic if not too
 bright Abramowicz enthusiastically spiked the cat.

Top
Subj:     Cat In A Fish Bowl (S520b,d)
          From: edapsmas on 1/6/2007
 Source: http://www.youtube.com/embed/xFKiUCYUypw

 In this video, a cat climb into an impossibly small fish
 bowl. You can see this video by clicking 'HERE'.

Top
Subj:     Cat Quotations (S95)

 Never try to outstubborn a cat.
   -- Lazarus Long, "Time Enough for Love"

 Women and cats do as they dammed well please.
 Men and dogs had best learn to live with it...
   -- Heinlein's "Notebooks of Lazarus Long"

 Do not meddle in the affairs of cats,
 for they are subtle and will piss on your computer.

From: RFSlick on 98-05-13
 I love cats...they taste just like chicken.

From: Bawdy.Net Collage #261 on 98-07-25
 Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as Gods.
 Cats have never forgotten this.

From: ossama on 98-11-24
 "Managing senior programmers is like herding cats."
    -- Dave Platt

 "Do not meddle in the affairs of cats, for they are
 subtle and will piss on your computer."  -- Bruce Graham

 "There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast."
    -- Unknown

 "Cats are smarter than dogs.  You can't get eight cats
 to pull a sled through snow." -- Jeff Valdez

 "In a cat's eye, all things belong to cats."
    -- English proverb

 "As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat."
    -- Ellen Perry Berkeley

 "One cat just leads to another." -- Ernest Hemingway

 "Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and
 get back to you later."  -- Mary Bly

 "Cats are rather delicate creatures and they are subject to
 a good many ailments, but I never heard of one who suffered
 from insomnia."  -- Joseph Wood Krutch

 "People that hate cats, will come back as mice in their
  next life."  -- Faith Resnick

 "There are many intelligent species in the universe.
  They are all owned by cats."  -- Anonymous

 "I have studied many philosophers and many cats.  The
  wisdom of cats is infinitely superior."
    -- Hippolyte Taine

 "No heaven will not ever Heaven be; Unless my cats are
  there to welcome me."  -- Unknown

 "There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life:
  music and cats."  --  Albert Schweitzer

 "The cat has too much spirit to have no heart."
    -- Ernest Menaul

 "Dogs believe they are human.  Cats believe they are God."

 "Time spent with cats is never wasted."  -- Colette

 "Some people say that cats are sneaky, evil, and cruel.
  True, and they have many other fine qualities as well."
    -- Missy Dizick

 "You will always be lucky if you know how to make friends
  with strange cats."  -- Colonial American proverb

 "Cats seem to go on the principle that it never does any
  harm to ask for what you want."  -- Joseph Wood Krutch

 "I got rid of my husband.  The cat was allergic."

 "My husband said it was him or the cat... I miss
  him sometimes."

 "Cats aren't clean, they're just covered with cat spit."

From: pethumor.com on 6/20/2002 (S181b)
 "Every dog has his day - but the nights
  are reserved for the cats."  -- Unknown

 "The problem with cats is that they get the same exact
  look whether they see a moth or an ax-murderer."
   -- Paula Poundstone

 "When the mouse laughs at the cat there's a hole nearby."
   -- Nigerian Proverb

From: LABLaughs.com on 4/12/2006 (S482b)
 "No matter how much cats fight, there always seems to
  be plenty of kittens."  -- Abraham Lincoln

From: igiggle on 4/21/2006 (S482b)
 It's easy to understand why the cat has eclipsed the dog as
 modern America's favorite pet.  People like pets to possess
 the same qualities they do.  Cats are irresponsible and
 recognize no authority, yet are completely dependent on
 others for their material needs.  Cats cannot be made to do
 anything useful.  Cats are mean for the fun of it.
   -- P.J. O'Rourke


Subj:     Short Cat Jokes And Facts

Top
Subj:     Stray Cats (S659)
          Created by Millan.net
          From: LABLaughsClean on 8/28/2009
 Source: (Removed from millan.net)
 This web page about stray cats is very cute.  Click 'HERE'
 to see it.
 

Top
Subj:     Seeing Eye Cat (S593b) 
          From: hellgunner50 on 6/2/2008
 You can see this cute picture and story on my site
 by clicking 'HERE'.
 

Top
Subj:     Free To Good Home (S587b in Marriage6)
          From: LABLaughsAdult on 4/16/2008
..........At: (Removed from buffaloschips.com)
 You can read this cute classified ad by clicking 'HERE'.
 

Top
Subj:     Mischievous Cats (S585b,d)
          From: MetaCafe.com on 4/8/2008
 Source: (Removed from metacafe.com)
 This cute cat video is several clips of cats doing silly,
 dumb things. It is no longer available for viewing.
 

Top
Subj:     Two Faced Kitten (S576d)
          From: WeWin.com on 1/22/2008
 Source: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IZ9aMfttEy8
 This kitten was born in Ohio in 2006. It has two mouths
 that meow in unison, two noses and four eyes that have
 not opened yet.  Click 'HERE' to see this strange, cute kitten.
 

Top
Subj:     Kitten Cannon (S570b,d)
          From: BootyArcade.com on 12/24/2007
 Source: http://www.bootyarcade.com/play
.........games/3252/kitten-cannon.html
 Try to shoot the kitten the farthest distance with the cannon.
 You can play this sick game by clicking 'HERE'.
 

Top
Subj:     Talking Cats (S570b,d)
          From: ginafm on 12/22/2007
 Source: https://www.youtube.com/embed/kPqkgZHH9bM
 In this strange video, three cats appear to be talking.
 Click 'HERE' to view this 2006 video.
 

Top
Subj:     Kitten And Bird Are Best Friends (S565d)
          From: ginafm on 11/18/2007 (in Birds)
 Source: (Removed from metacafe.com)
 This video tells the story of an abandoned kitten and
 the crow that adopted it.  You can view it by clicking 'HERE'.
 

Top
Subj:     Cat Looses It's Tail (S564c)
          From: SCOTCOB on 11/9/2007
 A blonde was weed-eating her yard and accidentally cut off
 the tail of her cat which was hiding in the grass.  She
 rushed her cat, along with the tail over to WALMART!

 Why WALMART???

 HELLOOOOOOOOO!

 WALMART is the largest retailer in the world!!!
 

Top
Subj:     Simon's Cat In "Wake-Up"
          From: edapsmas on 10/14/2007 (S560b,d)
 Source: http://www.youtube.com/embed/mEi0p6m3LYs
 In this cartoon video, Simon's cat decides it is time for
 Simon to wake up.  Clicking 'HERE' to videw this cute clip.
 

Top
Subj:     Refrigerator Magnet (S558c)
          From: AFine963 on 9/24/2007
 You can see this cute, sick, refrigerator magnet
 by clicking 'HERE'.
 

Top
Subj:.....Blind Cat Cartoon (S544b)
          From: LABLaughsClean on 6/19/2007
..........At: (Removed from lablaughs.com)
 You can view this cute cartoon by clicking 'HERE'.
 

Top
Subj:    Look Daddy - Kittens (S508b in Oth-Anim-Sup)
         From: LABLaughsClean on 10/17/2006
 Source: (Removed from lablaughs.com)
 You can see this cute photo by clicking 'HERE'.
 

Top
Subj:     Cat Scan Cartoon (S380)
          From: DafterLafter on 5/6/2004
..........At: (Removed fromk ezines4all.com)
 You can view this cute cartoon by clicking 'HERE'.

Top
Subj:     How Cats Sleep - Cartoon (S404)
          From: LABLaughsClean 02-16-2004 on 2/16/2004
 Source: (Removed from buffalosjokes.com)
 You can view this cute cartoon by clicking 'HERE'.
 

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Subj:     Free Cat (S501c)
          From: darrell94590 on 8/22/2006
 This is a funny, insensitive photo.  To see click 'HERE'.
 

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Subj:     Hairball Bowling (S484b,d)
          From: igiggle on 5/2/2006
 Source: (Removed from upchucky.com)
 This is a small, silly, bowling game.  You can play it
 by clicking 'HERE'.
 

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Subj:     Stuff on Cats - Cat Lovers Site (S452)
          From: Ann Zeise on 9/25/2005
 The site http://www.stuffonmycat.com/index.php is dedicated
 to cats and cat lovers.  I hope you enjoy it.
 

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Subj:     20 Ways To Have Fun With A Pussy (S448b)
          From: LABLaughsAdult on 8/17/2005 (in Pussy)
..........At: (Removed from lablaughs.com)
 You can view this large cartoon by clicking 'HERE'.
 

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Subj:     Farm Cats - Picture (S427b)
          From: LABLaughsClean on 3/30/2005
 Source: (Removed from lablaughs.com)
 If I see a picture I like, you are stuck with an opportunity
 to see it.  You can view it by clicking 'HERE'.
 

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Subj:     Clear Screen (S420b)
          From: igiggle on 2/9/2005
 At: (Removed from clean-your-screen-for-free-now.com)
 The cute SWF video 'Clear Screen' can only be viewed at the
 source.  This SWF is no longer available.
 

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Subj:     Mouse Cake (S420b)
          From: LABLaughsClean on 2/7/2005
 Source: (Removed from ezines4all.com)
 The cartoon 'Mouse Cake' can be viewed by clicking 'HERE'.
 

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Subj:     Clay Kitten Shooting (S372b,d)
          From: LABLaughs.com
          on 3/10/2004 (in Games-Supp)
 Source: (Removed from richsalter.btinternet.co.uk)
 In this SWF game, you shoot kittens as clay pigeons.  Click
 'HERE' to play this silly game.
 

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Subj:     Many Cute Kitten Photos (S372b)
          From: igiggle on 3/4/2004
 Source: (Removed from kittens.sytes.org)
 This web page has been removed by the author.

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Subj:     Mutts Comic Strip (S364b)
          From: Vallejo Times Herald Newspaper
          on 1/6/04 (in Other_Drawings2)
 The cat wants a milk bath.  You can see comic strip
 by clicking 'Here'.
 

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Subj:     Pussy Warmer (S364)
          From: Imogenelumen
          on 1/15/2004 (in Animals3)
 The picture "Pussy Warmer" can be see by click 'Here'.
 

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Subj:     Virtual Cat Maukie (S344b, S446d)
          From: JOELFALLON on 8/31/2003
 Source: http://www.maryparker.org/
 If you tease her with the "mouse" pointer on her chest
 or stomach she will purr, she will meow when you rubbing
 her forehead with the pointer.  If you make a slow circle
 around her body, not only will her head/eyes follow your
 pointer, but toward the top, her paw will go up to strike
 at the pointer---the same when the pointer is passed
 horizontally below her., and when in front of her at the
 bottom, her paw comes out like she wants to play with the
 mouse pointer.  When the pointer is not moving, you can
 see her breathing.  Try them all.  Click 'HERE' to start.
 

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Subj:     Fred the cat... (S283b)
          From: RFSlick on 7/2/2002
 Copy and paste and go to this sight...funny
 (Removed from catenema.com/cat1.html)
 and learn the story of Fred the cat.
 

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Subj:     Cat And Mice Riddle (S253)
          From: LABLaughs.com on 12/2/2001
 Mouse hunt If three cats catch three mice in three
 minutes, how many cats would be needed to catch 100
 mice in 100 minutes?

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ANSWER

 The same three cats would do. Since these three cats are
 averaging one mouse per minute, given 100 minutes, the
 cats could catch 100 mice.
 

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Subj:     Cat And Mice Riddle II (S299b, S549)
          From: LABLaughs.com on 10/25/2002
 If 5 cats catch 5 mice in 5 minutes, how long will it
 take one cat to catch a mouse?

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ANSWER

Five minutes.
 

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Subj:     Cat Hair Riddle (S239b)
          From: LABLaughs.com on 8/29/2001
 It's proven that cats have more hair on one side than
 their other side.  Some people believe that this is
 because when cats lie on one side they need insulation
 from the cold on the floor or ground.  Which side of a
 cat has more hair?

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Answer:

Outside of the Cat.
 

 Cats took many thousands of years to domesticate humans.

 In Ventura County, California, cats and dogs are not
 allowed to have sex without a permit.
 

From: RFSlick on 98-04-30
 Studies show that if a cat falls off the seventh floor of
 a building it has about thirty percent less chance of
 surviving than a cat that falls off the twentieth floor.
 It supposedly takes about eight floors for the cat to
 realise what is occurring, relax and correct itself.

From: homeschooling.guide on 99-01-10 (S102)
 I like cats, too. Let's exchange recipes.

From: auntieg 98-05-09
 A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.

From: BawdyNet test part 3! on 98-03-01
 *Cat's urine glows under a black light.

 *Cats have over one hundred vocal sounds, while dogs only
 have about ten.

From: grs on 98-04-05
 If you throw a cat out the window, is it considered kitty
 litter?

From: Bawdy.Net Collage #284 on 99-02-06
 If I want to hear the pitter patter of little feet,
 I'll put shoes on my cat.

From: Tom_Adams on 99-02-10 (S107)
 Researchers now say that if your shoes smell bad, you can
 remove the smell by filling the shoe with kitty litter.
 That's supposed to remove the smell over night - of course
 unless you have a cat!

From: TA989287 on 09/11/1999 (S137)
 The more you run over a dead cat, the flatter it gets.

From: gsm on 09/15/1999
 Men know that the reason men don't like cats
 is because they don't know how to cook them.

From: Joke-Of-The-Day on 7/15/2002 (S285b)
 Dogs have owners. Cats have staff.

From: Sonny at Bridge Club on 11/23/04 (S409b - food-etc2)
 Show me a man who hates cats,
 And I'll show you a man who can't cook.
 

 Q: How do you make a cat go woof?
 A: Douse it in petrol and throw a match at it.

 Q: What is a cat's favorite song?
 A: Three Blind Mice.

From: humorlist-digest V2 #115 on 98-05-10
 Q: Did you hear about the cat who swallowed a ball of yarn?
 A: She had mittens!

From: igiggle on 2/8/2005 (S420b)
 Q: What do you call a cat that leads a gang
    of neutered kitties?
 A: Queen of spayeds.

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