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Subj:     Rabbit Jokes
..........(Includes 21 jokes and articles, 17 1131n,7,cf,wXT,5)
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..........L5 Update
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Bunny Bubbles from
PageWorks
Includes the following:  Speed Bump Cartoon (S951)
.........................A Lab Rabbit Gets Free (S110)
.........................30-Second Bunny Theater Library - Web Site (S582)
.........................Paddy And A Priest Go Rabbit Hunting (S682b)
.........................Bambi And Thumper Do Exist - Web Page w/11 Photos (S514)
.........................Little Girl Buys A Rabbit (S351)
.........................Crazy Rabbit - SWF Interactive Video (S503c)
.........................Rabbit Running Through Forrest (S233)
.........................Beware of Identity Theft - Web Page w/18 Photos (S593b)
.........................CIA, FBI, And LAPD Go Rabbit Hunting (S148)
.........................Bunny Letter Opener - Web Page w/Animated GIF (S687b)
.........................The Rabbit And The Snake (S121)
.........................Short Rabbit Jokes (DU)
..............................The Rabbit Vs The Snake - Video (S521)

Also see ASCII ART III- 'Energizer Bunny'
         BEAR file    - 'Bear And Rabbit Take A Shit'
         COMPUTERS3   - 'New Mouse - SWF Video'
         DOGS-SUPP2   - 'Dog Brings Brings Home A Rabbit'
         EASTER - EGGS- 'Saving The Easter Bunny'
.........................(Dead Rabbit Revived)
         GENIE file   - 'Three Wishes From A Genie III'
         HEAVEN2 file - 'Martha Contacts John After Death'
         JOBS2 file   - 'Lesson number one: The Crow and the Rabbit'
         MUSIC-SUPP2  - 'Bizarro Cartoon'
         PRIESTS2     - 'Promotions For Priests'
         WORDJOKE-SUPP- 'Raising Rabbits In Paris'

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Subj:     Speed Bump Cartoon (S951)
          Drawn by Dave Coverly
          From: Becky Dobry in 2015
 Source: www.gocomics.com/speedbump/2013/02/10
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Subj:     A Lab Rabbit Gets Free (S110, S644, S1131)
          From: ArmaDillow in 1997

 A rabbit one day managed to break free from the laboratory
 where he had been born and brought up.  As he scurried away
 from the fencing of the compound, he felt grass under his
 little feet and saw the dawn breaking for the first time in
 his life. 'Wow, this is great,' he thought.

 It wasn't long before he came to a hedge and, after squeezing
 under it he saw a wonderful sight: lots of other bunny rabbits,
 all free and nibbling at the lush grass.

 'Hey,' he called. 'I'm a rabbit from the laboratory and I've
 just escaped.  Are you wild rabbits?'

 'Yes. Come and join us,' they cried.

 Our friend hopped over to them and started eating the grass.
 It tasted so good. 'What else do you wild rabbits do?' he
 asked.

 'Well,' one of them said. 'You see that field there? It's got
 carrots growing in it. We dig them up and eat them.'

 This, he couldn't resist and he spent the next hour eating
 the most succulent carrots. They were wonderful.

 Later, he asked them again, 'What else do you do?'

 'You see that field there?  It's got lettuce growing in it.
 We eat that as well.'

 The lettuce tasted just as good and he returned a while
 later completely full.  'Is there anything else you guys
 do?' he asked.

 One of the other rabbits came a bit closer to him and spoke
 softly.  'There's one other thing you must try.  You see
 those rabbits there,' he said, pointing to the far corner
 of the field.  'They're girls.  We shag them.  Go and try
 it.'

 Well, our friend spent the rest of the morning screwing his
 little heart out until, completely knackered, he staggered
 back over to the guys.

 'That was fantastic,' he panted.

 'So are you going to live with us then?' one of them asked.

 'I'm sorry, I had a great time but I can't.'

 The wild rabbits all stared at him, a bit surprised. 'Why?
 We thought you liked it here.'

 'I do,' our friend replied. 'But I've got to get back to
 the laboratory. I'm dying for a cigarette.'

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Subj:     30-Second Bunny Theater Library
          From: ginafm
..........in 2008 (S582)
 Source: www.angryalien.com/

 The 30-Second Bunnies Theater Library, in which a troupe
 of bunnies parodies a collection of movies by re-enacting
 them in 30 seconds.  Click on the above source to view
 these classics videos in 30 seconds.

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Subj:     Paddy And A Priest Go Rabbit Hunting
          From: LABLaughsAdult in 2010 (S682b)

 Paddy decides to go rabbit hunting, but when he gets to
 his favorite field he sees the village priest is already
 there.  Paddy watches with fascination as the priest holds
 his finger over a rabbit hole and immediately a rabbit
 pops out.

 The priest grabs it and puts it into a sack.  He repeats
 this unusual but very successful technique until his sack
 is full of rabbits.  Paddy stops the priest and asks him
 how he does it.

 "Easy," says the priest. "Put your finger on your wife's
 pussy and then hold it over a rabbit hole.  They can't
 resist the smell, so when they come out, grab them."

 Paddy rushes home to find Maureen bent over scrubbing
 the floor. He lifts up her skirt and applies his finger
 as directed. Without looking up, Maureen giggles, "Holy
 Moses, Father!  Rabbit hunting again?"

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Subj:     Bambi And Thumper Do Exist (S514)
          From: darrell94590 in 2006

 Enjoy these eleven, wonderful pictures by clicking 'HERE'.
 

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Subj:     Little Girl Buys A Rabbit
          From: RFSlick in 2003 (S351, S529c)

 An adorable little girl, all blonde curls and blue eyes,
 walks into a pet shop and asks in the sweetest little lisp:
 "Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep widdle wabbits?"

 The shopkeeper's heart melts and he gets down on his knees
 so that he's on her level and asks, "Do you want a widdle
 white wabby or a thoft and fuwwy bwack wabby or maybe one
 like that cute widdle bwown wabby over there?"

 She, blushing, rocks on her heels, puts her hands on her
 knees, leans forward and says in a quiet voice, "I don't
 fink my python weally gives a phwuck."

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Subj:     Crazy Rabbit (S503c)
          From: catlynnbray
..........in 2006 (d-On Site,SWF)

 Move your mouse around the rabbit...but don't let him grab
 the pointer....  shake the rabbit off if he catches you...
 this is very cute.  Click 'HERE' to try it.
 

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Subj:     Rabbit Running Through Forrest
          From: coreymac in 2001 (S233)

 A little rabbit is happily running through the forest when
 he stumbles upon a giraffe rolling a joint.  The rabbit
 looks at her and says, "Giraffe my friend, why do you do
 this?  Come with me running through the forest, you'll see,
 you'll feel so much better!"  The giraffe looks at him,
 looks at the joint, tosses it and goes off running with
 the rabbit.

 Then they come across an elephant doing coke, so the rabbit
 again says, "Elephant my friend, why do you do this?  Think
 about your health.  Come running with us through the pretty
 forest, you'll see, you'll feel so good!"  The elephant
 looks at them, looks at his razor, mirror and all, then
 tosses them and starts running with the rabbit and giraffe.

 The three animals then come across a lion about to shoot up
 and the rabbit again says, "Lion my friend, why do you do
 this?  Think about your health!  Come running with us
 through the sunny forest, you will feel so good!"

 The lion looks at him, puts down his needle, and starts to
 beat the shit out of the rabbit.  As the giraffe and
 elephant watch in horror, they look at him and ask, "Lion,
 why did you do this? He was merely trying to help us all!"

 The lion answers, "That little fucker!  He makes me run
 around the forest like an idiot each time he's on ecstasy!"

Top
Subj:     Beware of Identity Theft (S593b)
          From: ginafm on 6/3/2008

 You can view these eighteen cute animal photos on my
 site by clicking 'HERE'.
 

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Subj:     CIA, FBI, And LAPD Go Rabbit Hunting
          From: JOKE-OF-THE-DAY.com in 1999 (S148)

 The CIA, the FBI, and the Los Angeles Police Department
 (LAPD) are all trying to prove that they are the best at
 apprehending criminals.  The President decides to give them
 a test.  He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of
 them has to catch it.

 The CIA goes in.  They place animal informants throughout
 the forest.  They question all plant and mineral witnesses.
 After three months of extensive investigations, they conclude
 that rabbits do not exist.

 The FBI goes in.  After two weeks with no leads they burn
 the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit
 and they make no apologies.  The rabbit had it coming.

 The LAPD goes in.  They come out two hours later dragging a
 badly beaten bear.  The bear is screaming, "Okay, okay!  I'm
 a RABBIT!!  I'm a RABBIT!!"

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Subj:     Bunny Letter Opener - GIF
          From Dump.com
..........in 2010 (S687b)
 Source: (Removed from dump.com/2010/03/09)

 Click 'HERE' to see very cute, animated GIF.
 

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Subj:     The Rabbit And The Snake
          From: ipkis in 1997 (S121, S441b)

 A rabbit and a snake were both born blind and as orphans.  One
 day about 2 years after their birth the snake was slithering
 through the forest, when the rabbit hopped right into him, and
 knocked them both down.

 "I am sorry," said the rabbit as he was getting up "but I was
 born both blind and an orphan, so I don't know what I am."

 "That's ok," said the snake, "so was I, but if you would like,
 I could slither over you and tell you what you are, so you can
 know that."

 "Ok" said the bunny

 So the snake slithered over the bunny "you have a furry tail, a
 squiggly-wiggly nose, long bushy ears, and soft fur, you must be
 a bunny rabbit."

 The rabbit jumped with joy then said "Let me rub my paw on you
 so that you can know what you are "

 The snake was glad to have the bunny do that, so the bunny rubbed
 his paws all over the snake. "Lets see, you are slimy, you have
 scales, a forked tongue, and no balls.  You must be a lawyer."


Subj:     Short Rabbit Jokes (DU)
 

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Subj:     The Rabbit Vs The Snake
          From: edapsmas in 2007
..........(S521d-iFrame, S751)
 Source: www.youtube.com/embed/UcG-u30JLT8
 This is a video about one tough rabbit who chases
 and bites a snake. You can view it by clicking 'HERE'.
 

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 The only 2 animals that can see behind itself without
 turning it's head are the rabbit and the parrot.
 

From: humorlist-digest V2 #116 in 1998
 Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery.
 

From: igiggle in 2003 (S349b)
 Rabbits take about 18 naps a day, on average.
 (I wanna be a rabbit.)

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 Q: What do you call spending the afternoon with a cranky
    rabbit?
 A: A bad hare day.  --  Holly

From: JBCARY1 in 2001 (S238)
 Q: How do you catch a unique rabbit?
 A: Unique up on it.

 Q: How do you catch a tame rabbit?
 A: Tame way, unique up on it.

From: funnies in 2002 (S281b)
 Q: What do you call a line of rabbits walking backwards?
 A: A receding hairline!

From: igiggle in 2005 (S459b)
 Q: What do you call a holiday that rabbits go on when
    they first get married?
 A: Bunnymoon!

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...........................From Zoo World
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