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Subject: The Sunday Morning Laughs #570
         Date: 1/6/2008
 

"Men show their characters in nothing more clearly than in what
 they think laughable." Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749 - 1832)
 

The best jokes I receive each week are from you folks.
If you get a good joke please pass it on to me, I enjoy
a good laugh and it cut down the work.  If you don't get
you Sunday Laughs, or want a back issue, drop me a note.
 

Go to http://jokelibrary.net/a_joke_library.html
to read the great jokes you have sent me through the years
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Subj:     iPhone Mystery
          From: LifeTimeGamerArcade on 12/23/2007
 Source: http://www.lifetimegamerarcade.com/index.php?params=play/1453/

 In this Titanic type game, you must fine the missing objects on 
 several screens.  You can play it at the source above, or 
 on my web site by clicking below.

 http://jokelibrary.net/xOtherNtoZ/n_to_v/phone-supp-iphone.html

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Subj:     Mrs. Hughes' Comedy
          From: darrellvip on 12/19/2007 
 Source: http://www.mrshughes.com/
 Source2: http://crackle.com/c/High_Wire/Mrs_hughes_skewed_views/2041059#vt=1

 Mrs. Hughes is a very funny comedian, especially for the 
 older generation.  You can hear her at the two sources 
 above, or on my web site by clicking below.

 http://jokelibrary.net/words/q_to_w/q-comed-supp-Mrs_hughes.html

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Subj:     Korean Freestyle Slalom Rollerblading
          From: tom on 12/20/2007
 Source: http://www.glumbert.com/media/koreanfreestyle

 This little girl is amazing!!  This is really amazing to watch! 
 A possible new Olympic sport...  Be patient; she contemplates 
 for a bit but you'll see why...  You can view this movie at 
 the source above, or on my web site by clicking below.

 http://jokelibrary.net/sports/a_to_z/z_other-rollerblading.html

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Subj:     OB-Gyn Phone Answering Message
          By Jolene Roxbury 
          From: gordonschuk on 12/23/2007

 This phone answering message is both stupid and cute. 
 You can listen to it on my web site by clicking below.

 http://jokelibrary.net/people/f_women-supp.html#ob_gyn

or

 http://jokelibrary.net/people/f_wom/w-supp-ob_gyn.mp3

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Subj:     Learning To Use Grown Up Words
          From: ipkis on 97-06-11

 The kindergartners were now in the first grade.  Their teacher 
 wanted them to be more grown up since they were no longer in 
 kindergarten.  She told them to use grown-up words instead of 
 baby words.  She then asked them to tell her what they did 
 during the summer. 

 The first little one said he went to see his Nana.  The teacher 
 said, "No, No, you went to see your grandmother. Use the grown- 
 up word." 

 The next little one said she went for a trip on a choo-choo. 
 The teacher again said, "No, No, you went on a trip on a train. 
 That's the grown-up word." 

 Then the teacher asked the third one, Little Johnny, what he 
 did during the summer.  He proudly stated that he read a book. 
 The teacher asked what book he had read. 

 Johnny puffed out his chest and in a very adult way replied, 
 "Winnie the Shit."
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Subj:     'Twas The Week After Christmas
          From: LABLaughsClean on 12/29/2007 

 'Twas the week after Christmas, and all through the house 
 Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse. 
 The cookies I'd nibbled, the eggnog I'd taste 
 At the holiday parties had gone to my waist. 

 When I got on the scales there arose such a number! 
 When I walked to the store (less a walk than a lumber). 

 I'd remember the marvelous meals I'd prepared; 
 The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared, 

 The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese 
 And the way I'd never said, "No thank you, please." 

 As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt 
 And prepared once again to do battle with dirt 

 I said to myself, as I only can 
 "You can't spend a winter disguised as a man!" 

 So away with the last of the sour cream dip, 
 Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip 

 Every last bit of food that I like must be banished 
 "Till all the additional ounces have vanished. 

 I won't have a cookie - not even a lick. 
 I'll want only to chew on a long celery stick. 

 I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie, 
 I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry. 

 I'm hungry, I'm lonesome, and life is a bore 
 But isn't that what January is for? 

 Unable to giggle, no longer a riot. 
 Happy New Year to all and to all a good diet!

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Subj:     Math Prob. - 100 Men (S570 math4b-supp2) 
          From: Puzzles And Brain Teasers on 9/12/2007 
 Source: http://www.apuzzlezone.com/adailypuzzle/12-15-07.html

 In a certain town, of each 100 men 85 are married, 70 
 have a telephone, 75 own a car, and 80 own their own 
 house.  Always on a base of 100 men, what is the least 
 possible number who are married, have a telephone, own 
 a car, and own their own house? 

 The solution can be found on my web site by clicking below.

 http://jokelibrary.net/education/m_files/m4bS2-100_men.html

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Laughing Smiley from
flovilla on 9/23/2005

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