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Subj:     Leningrad Cowboys & Red Army Choir 
          Singing SWEET HOME ALABAMA
          From: rfslick on 4/13/2008
 Source: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0lNFRLrP014

 Back in the days of the Soviet Union, the Soviet Red 
 Army had an official choir composed of male soldiers and 
 musicians.  It still exists.  The Red Army Choir performs 
 throughout Russia to this day. 

 Now consider the Finnish rock band called The Leningrad 
 Cowboys.  A little while ago, they held a concert in 
 Russia, in which - to the screaming applause of Russian 
 teenagers - they got the Red Army Choir to join them on 
 stage for a performance of  'Sweet Home Alabama.'  In 
 English!  You couldn't make this up! 

 You can view this amazing concert at the above source, 
 or on my web site by clicking below.

 http://www.jokelibrary.net/nationalities/a_to_z/russian-leningrad.html

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Subj:     Lucky Day At The Race
          From: edapsmas on 4/11/2008

 This very short movie shows a very lucky worker 
 at the raceway.  Click below to view it.

 http://www.jokelibrary.net/xOtherAtoM/cars/cars2-lucky.html

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Subj:     Lucky Day At The Train Station
          From: edapsmas on 4/11/2008

 This very short movie shows a very lucky couple 
 at train station.  Click below to view it.

 http://www.jokelibrary.net/xOtherNtoZ/n_to_v/train-lucky.html

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Subj:     User Error Message
          From: LABLaughsClean on 3/12/2008
 Source: http://www.lablaughs.com/clean_toon.php?id=C20050124

 You can view this cute, stupid, computer interrupt message 
 at the source above, or on my web site by clicking below.

 http://www.jokelibrary.net/xOtherAtoM/comp/c1-user.html

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Subj:     Senior Breakfeast Special
          From: darrellvip on 4/11/2008 
 Source: http://www.jokelibrary.net/occupations/waiter-waitress.html#special

 We went to breakfast at a restaurant where 
 the 'seniors' special' was two eggs, bacon, 
 hash browns and t oast for $1.99. 

 'Sounds good,' my wife said. 'But I don't 
 want the eggs.'

 "Then I'll have to charge you two dollars and forty-nine 
 cents because you're ordering a la carte," the waitress 
 warned her. 

 "You mean I'd have to pay for not taking the eggs?"  My 
 wife asked incredulously.  "I'll take the special." 

 "How do you want your eggs?" 

 "Raw and in the shell," my wife replied.  She took the 
 two eggs home.  DON'T MESS WITH SENIORS.

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Subj:     Piano Player Wanted In A Bar
          From: LABLaughsAdult on 4/10/2008 

 He was a ragged looking old man who shuffled into the bar 
 that afternoon.  Stinking of whiskey and cigarettes, his 
 hands shook as he took the "Piano Player Wanted" sign 
 from the window and gave it to the bartender. "I'd like 
 to apply for the job," he said.  The bar-keep wasn't too 
 sure about this doubtful looking old guy, but it had been 
 awhile since he had a player and business was falling off. 

 "What do you do?" he asked. 

 "I used to be a F-4 fighter pilot in Vietnam," was the 
 answer. Now, really unsure, the bar-keep decided to give 
 him a try...he really needed more business. "The piano 
 is over there...give it a go." The old man staggered his 
 way over to the piano and several patrons snickered. But, 
 by the time he was into the third bar of music, every 
 voice was silenced.  What followed was a rhapsody of 
 sound and music unlike anyone had ever heard in the bar 
 before.  When he finished, there wasn't a dry eye in the 
 place.  The bartender brought the old guy a beer and said 
 that he sounded really,really good. "What do you call 
 that?" he asked.  "It's called "Drop YourPanties, Baby, 
 We're Gonna Rock Tonight," said the old pilot as he took 
 along pull from the beer. 

 "I got another," ...and he began to play again.  What 
 followed was a knee-slappin', hand-clappin' bit of 
 ragtime that had the place jumping.  People were coming 
 in from the streets to hear this guy play.  After he 
 finished, the pilot acknowledged  the applause and told 
 the crowd that the song was called "Big Boobs Make My 
 Afterburner Dance."  He then excused himself as he 
 lurched off to the men's room.  After thinking a bit, 
 the bartender decided to hire the guy, no matter how bad 
 he looked,  or what his songs were called.  When the guy 
 came out of the men's room, the bartender went over to 
 tell him he had the job, but noticed that the old fighter 
 pilot's  fly was undone and his member was hanging out. 
 He said, "The job is yours, but first I got to ask, do 
 you know your fly is open and your dick is hanging out? 

 "Know it?" "Hell, I wrote it!" the pilot replied.

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Subj:     6 Truths Of Life
          From: LABLaughsClean on 3/11/2008 
  
  

 1. You cannot touch all your teeth with your tongue. 
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  

 2. All idiots, after reading the first 'truth', will try it. 
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  

 3. The first truth is a lie. 
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  

 4. You are smiling now because you're an idiot. 
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  

 5. You will soon forward this to another idiot. 
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  

 6. There is still a stupid smile on your face.

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Subj:     Physics Saves Lives!
          From: Internet Humor Archive source: Prabhu M. Arumugam
      and From: FrankRoesch on 12/13/1999

 As a premed student at Washington University in St. Louis,
 I had to take a difficult class in physics.  One day our
 professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept.
 A student rudely interrupted to ask "Why do we have to learn
 this stuff?"

 "To save lives." the professor responded quickly and continued
 the lecture.  A few minutes later, the same student spoke up
 again. "So how does physics save lives?" he persisted.

 "It keeps the ignoramuses out of medical school," replied the
 professor.

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.

Smiley and eyebrows from Imogenelumen on 12/17/2003