Subject: The
Sunday Morning Laughs #598c
Date: 7/20/2008
You can also view old ‘Sunday Morning
Laughs’ at
http://jokelibrary.net/archive/index.html
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Subj: Redneck
Art
From: ft.apache on 6/27/2008
This redneck artist does a
beautiful picture while he is
eating barbacued ribs.
To see this movie, click below.
http://www.jokelibrary.net/occupations/art/supp-redneck.html
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Subj: Herman
Comics On Ham Operators
From: Comics.com on 6/28/2008
Source: http://www.comics.com/comics/herman/index.html
You can view thos cute comic
strip by clicking below.
http://www.jokelibrary.net/animals/d_to_z/pig-operator.html
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Subj: Doctor
Gets Nurse Pregnant
From: RFSlick on 98-11-03
and From:
philsam on 6/28/2008
A doctor started having an
affair with his nurse. Shortly
after this started, she announced
that she had become
pregnant. Not wanting
his wife to find out, he gave her a
large amount of money and
asked her to go out of the country,
to Germany, to wait out the
pregnancy and have the baby over
there.
"But, how will you know when
our baby is born?" she asked.
"Well," he said, "after you've
had the baby, just send me a
postcard and write 'sauerkraut'
on the back."
Not knowing what else to do,
she took the money and went
off to Germany.
Six months went by and then
one day the doctor's wife called
him at his office.
"Dear, you received a very strange
postcard in the mail today,"
she explained. "I don't
understand what it means!"
"Just wait until I get home
and I'll read it," he replied.
Later that evening the Doctor
came home, read the postcard,
fell to the floor with a
heart attack. Paramedics rushed
him to the ER. The
lead medic stayed back to comfort the
wife. He asked what
trauma had precipitated the cardiac
arrest. So the wife
picked up the card and read "Sauerkraut,
Sauerkraut, Sauerkraut:
Two with wieners, One without!"
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Subj: The
Test
From: RFSlick on 98-10-12
and From: LABLaughsClean on 6/27/2008
What to do:
1) Grab a pen/pencil
and paper.
2) Mark the paper 1
to 10 down the side
3) Answer each question
and mark the corresponding letter
to your
answer on the paper
4) Calculate the point
score for each question for each
of your
answers
5) Total up the points
for all the questions and see
where
you land!
Here goes...
1. When do you feel
your best?
(a)
In the morning
(b)
During the afternoon and early evening
(c)
Late at night
2. Do you usually walk
(a)
fairly fast, with long steps?
(b)
fairly fast, but with short, quick steps?
(c)
less fast, head up looking the world in the face?
(d)
less fast, head down?
(e)
very slowly?
3. When talking to people,
do you
(a)
stand with your arms folded?
(b)
have your hands clasped?
(c)
have one or both your hands on your hips?
(d)
touch or push the person to whom you are talking?
(e)
play with your ear, touch your chin, or smooth your hair?
4. When relaxing, do
you sit with
(a)
your knees bent and your legs neatly side by side?
(b)
your legs crossed?
(c)
your legs stretced out or straight?
(d)
with one leg curled under you?
5. When something really
amuses you, how do you react? Do you give
(a)
a big, appreciative laugh?
(b)
a laugh, but not a loud one?
(c)
a quiet chuckle?
(d)
a big smile?
(e)
a slow smile?
6. When you go to a
party or social gathering, you
(a) make
a loud entrance so everyone notices you?
(b) make
a quieter entrance looking around quickly
for someone you know
(c) make
quietest possible entrance? and try to stay unnoticed?
7. You are working hard,
concentrating hard.
You are
interrupted. Do you
(a) welcome
the break?
(b) feel
extremely irritated?
(c) vary
between these two extremes?
8. Which of the following
colors do you like most
(a)
red or orange
(b)
black
(c)
yellow or light blue
(d)
green
(e)
dark blue or purple
(f)
white
(g)
brown, gray, or violet
9. When you are in
bed at night, in those last
few moments before going to sleep, do you lie
(a)
stretched out on your back?
(b)
stretched out face down on your stomach?
(c)
on your side, slightly curled?
(d)
with your head on one arm?
(e)
with your head under the covers?
10. Do you often dream that
you are
(a)
falling?
(b)
fighting or struggling?
(c)
searching for something or somebody?
(d)
flying or floating?
(e)
or do you usually have a dreamless sleep?
(f)
or do you have pleasant dreams?
" SCORE YOUR OWN QUIZ "
1. (a)
2 (b) 4 (c) 6
2. (a)
6 (b) 4 (c) 7 (d)
2 (e) 1
3. (a)
4 (b) 2 (c) 5 (d)
7 (e) 6
4. (a)
4 (b) 6 (c) 2 (d)
1
5. (a)
6 (b) 4 (c) 3 (d)
5 (e) 2
6. (a)
6 (b) 4 (c) 2
7. (a)
6 (b) 2 (c) 4
8. (a)
6 (b) 7 (c) 5 (d)
4 (e) 3 (f) 2 (g)
1
9. (a)
7 (b) 6 (c) 4 (d)
2 (e) 1
10. (a) 4
(b) 2 (c) 3 (d) 5
(e) 6 (f) 1
Add the total number of points.
Results:
OVER 60 POINTS:
Others see you as someone
they should "handle with care."
You are seen as vain, self-centered
and extremely dominant.
Others may admire you and
wish they could be more like you,
but they don't always trust
you and hesitate to become too
deeply involved with you.
FROM 51 TO 60 POINTS:
Your friends see you as an
exciting, highly volatile, rather
impulsive personality; a
natural leader, quick to make
decisions (though not always
the right ones). They see you
as a bold and venturesome;
someone who will try anything -
well almost anything - once;
someone who takes a chance and
enjoys an adventure.
They enjoy being in your company
because of the excitement
you radiate.
FROM 41 TO 50 POINTS:
Others see you as fresh,
lively, charming, amusing and
always interesting; someone
who is constantly the center
of attention, but sufficiently
well-balanced not to let
it go to your head.
They see you also as kind,
considerate and understanding;
someone who will cheer
them up and help them out.
FROM 31 TO 40 POINTS:
Other people see you as sensible,
cautious, careful and
practical. They see
you as clever, gifted or talented,
but modest. Not a person
who makes friends too quickly
or too easily, but someone
who is extremely loyal to the
friends you do make and who
expects the same loyalty in
return. Those who really
get to know you realize that
it takes a lot to shake your
trust in your friends, but,
equally, that it takes you
a long time to get over it if
that trust is shaken.
FROM 21 TO 30 POINTS:
Your friends see you as painstaking,
perhaps a little
fussy at times. They
see you as very, very cautious and
extremely careful; a slow
and steady plodder. It would
really surprise them if you
ever did something impulsively
or on the spur of the moment.
They expect you to examine
everything carefully from
every side and then, usually
decide against it. They think
this reaction on your part
is caused partly by your
carefully nature and partly by
laziness.
UNDER 21 POINTS:
People think you are shy,
nervous and indecisive, someone
needs to be looked after,
who always wants someone else
to make the decisions
and who doesn't want to get
involved with anyone or anything.
They see you as a
worrier, who sees problems
that don't exist. Some people
think your are boring.
Only the people who know you well
know that you aren't.
The trouble is that you don't let
very many people get close
to you.
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Subj: A
Response To A 3ed Level Preempt
From: BridgeClues.com on 6/28/2008
This wonderful web site has
daily problems if you click on
the bidding drop down menu.
Today's hand #5226 discusses
a response to a Michaels
cue bid. Click below to see this
bridge problem.
http://www.jokelibrary.net/xOtherAtoM/g2/a_bridge_column54.html
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..
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Smiley says 'Bye' from
darrell94590 on 9/7/2005 |
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