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Subject: The Sunday Morning Laughs #602
         Date:8/17/2008
 

"He who laughs, lasts."
    -- Mary Pettibone Poole
 

The best jokes I receive each week are from you folks.
If you get a good joke please pass it on to me, I enjoy
a good laugh and it cut down the work.  If you don't get
you Sunday Laughs, or want a back issue, drop me a note.
 

Go to http://jokelibrary.net/a_joke_library.html
to read the great jokes you have sent me through the years.
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Subj:     Opus On The Final Stage Of Oil Grief
          By Berkeley Breathed Jul 6, 2008 
          From: Salon.com on 7/21/2008
 Source: http://www.salon.com/comics/opus/2008/07/06/opus/

 This Opus Comic Strip is about achieving the final stage 
 of oil grief.  You can view this wonderful comic strip at 
 the above source, or on my web site by clicking below.

 http://www.jokelibrary.net/xOtherNtoZ/nat/nat-supp-opus.html

 You can view other great Opus Comic Strips by going to

 http://dir.salon.com/topics/berkeley_breathed/

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Subj:     State Of The Union Comic Strip
          by Carl Moore 
          From: Creators.com on 7/25/2008
 Source: http://www.creators.com/today-comics.html

 This political cartoon is quite funny.  You can 
 view it on my web site by clicking below.

 http://www.jokelibrary.net/xOtherNtoZ/polit/polit-supp-choice.html

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Subj:     Why Women Stay Single
          From: darrellvip on 7/24/2008

 You can watch this movie of men acting stupid by clicking
 below.

 http://www.jokelibrary.net/people/f_wom/w-supp-why.html

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Subj:     Photographing Thugs 'Is Assault'
          From: BoneheadOfTheDayAward@yahoogroups.com 
          on 7/24/2008
 Source: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1036728
........./Photographing-thugs-assault-police-tell-householder-
.........snapping-proof-anti-social-behaviour.html?ITO=1490#

 A UK man, harassed for months by rock throwing youths, 
 takes a picture of his tormentors.  Police arrive to warn 
 him that taking pictures of teens is considered "assault". 
 You can read this bizarre story at the above source, or 
 on my web site by clicking below.

 http://www.jokelibrary.net/nationalities/a_to_z/englishman-thugs.html

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Subj:     The Hunter And The Fly

 One day in the forest, there was a fly. And this fly was buzzing
 around above the surface of a small stream in the woods.  Under
 the water was a small fish who was thinking:  "When that fly
 drops four inches, boy oh boy, it's lunch time."  So the fish
 waited and the fly kept buzzing.

 Over on the shore of the stream, there lumbered a large grizzly
 bear who was observing this whole thing.  He grumbled to himself,
 "When that fish goes for that fly, hmm, hmm, it's lunch time."
 So the bear and the fish waited while the fly kept buzzing.

 At the same time, over in the woods, there was a hunter who had
 been eating his lunch and watching this whole thing transpire.
 He said to himself,  "When that bear goes for that fish, god
 dammit, I'm gonna have me a big trophy."  So they all waited some
 more.

 At the hunter's feet there was a mouse who stealthly worked his
 way closer. The mouse was saying to himself,  "When that hunter
 grabs his gun to shoot that bear, he's going to drop that sand-
 wich, then, yummy, it's lunch time."  And so the tension mounted
 once again.

 Little did the mouse know that as he waited, the hunter's cat had
 hopped from the back of his pickup truck and was on the prowl.
 The cat said to himself, "When that mouse goes for that sandwich,
 bam, he's a dead motherfucker...lunch..."  So they all waited for
 the crucial moment.

 Then all of the sudden,  the fly dropped four inches and the fish
 jumped.  The bear went for the fish and the hunter grabbed his
 gun and shot while the sandwich fell.  The mouse dove on the sand-
 wich and the cat followed and pounced on him.  Within a moment,
 the hunter realized what had happened exclaiming,  "Hey that's my
 lunch!"  He reached down and ripped the cat off the sandwich and
 hurdled him into the water.

 And what, pray tell, is the moral of this story?

 Anytime there's a fly dropping four inches, there's a pussy
 getting wet somewhere...

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Subj:     The Twenty And The One
          From: tom on 7/24/2008 

 A well-worn one-dollar bill and a similarly distressed 
 twenty-dollar bill arrived at a Federal Reserve Bank to 
 be retired.  As they moved along the conveyor belt to be 
 burned, they struck up a conversation. 

 The twenty-dollar bill reminisced about its travels all 
 over the country.  'I've had a pretty good life,' the 
 twenty proclaimed. 'Why I've been to Las Vegas and 
 Atlantic City, the finest restaurants in New York, 
 performances on Broadway, and even a cruise to the 
 Caribbean.' 

 'Wow!' said the one-dollar bill. 'You've really had an 
 exciting life!' 

 'So tell me,' says the twenty, 'where have you been 
 throughout your lifetime?' 

 The one dollar bill replies, 'Oh, I've been to the 
 Methodist Church, the Baptist Church, the Lutheran Church, 
 the Episcopalian church, the Presbyterian church, the 
 Catholic Church, ...' 

 The twenty-dollar bill interrupts, 'What's a church?' 

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Subj:     LOGIC PROB. - Hairs On The Head
          From: Puzzles And Brain Teasers on 7/22/2008 
 Source: http://www.apuzzlezone.com/adailypuzzle/07-18-08.html

 Given that there are more people living in Dublin than there are 
 hairs on the head of any Dubliner, and that no Dubliner is totally 
 bald, does it necessarily follow that there must be at least two 
 Dubliners with exactly the same number of hairs? 

 Here is a variant of the same problem: on the island of Alopecia, 
 the following facts are true: 
    1. No two islanders have exactly the same number of hairs. 
    2. No islander has precisely 450 hairs. 
    3. There are more islanders than there are hairs 
       on the head of any one islander. 
 What is the largest possible number of islanders on Alopecia? 

 The solution can be found on my web site by clicking below.

 http://www.jokelibrary.net/education/m_files/m4c-hair.html

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Subj:     Puzzle - Pony Puzzle
          From the book 
             "Mathematical Puzzles of Sam Loyd" 
          Edited by Martin Gardner 
          From: Dover Publications in 1959

 Rearrange the six pieces to make the best possible picture 
 of a horse. Click below to see the picture, the problem's 
 description, and its solution.

 http://www.jokelibrary.net/education/m_files/m4c-pony.html

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Laughing Smiley from
flovilla on 9/23/2005

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