Subject: The
Sunday Morning Laughs #605b
Date: 9/7/2008
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Subj:
Great TV Cowboys
From: darrellvip
on 8/11/2008 |
Source: http://www.greatdanepro.com/Western%20Stars/index.htm
This wonderful, 6,800 KB movie
reviews all the main cowboys
who appeared on TV and in
movies. You can view it at the
above source, or on my web
site by clicking below.
http://jokelibrary.net/occupations/cow/c2-cowboys.html
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Subj: Defence
Attorney Vs Doctor
From: Playboy February 1997
and From: Imogenelumen on 8/25/2003
This was taken from the Alameda
County District Attorney's
Office publication "The Point
of View".
In a murder trial, the defense
attorney was cross-examining
a pathologist. Here's
what happened:
As he cross-examined the coroner,
the defense attorney asked,
"Before you signed the death
certificate, had you taken the
man's pulse?"
"No," the coroner replied.
"Did you listen to the heart?"
"No"
"Oh? Did you check for breathing?"
"No."
"So when you signed the death
certificate," the attorney
asked with a smirk, "you
had not taken any steps to make
sure the man was dead, had
you?
"Let me put it this way,"
the badgered corner replied.
"The man's brain was sitting
in a jar on my desk. But,"
he added, "I guess that he
could still be out there
practicing law somewhere."
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Subj:
The Wishing Well
From: darrellvip on 8/7/2008 |
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This short Benny Hill movie
is cute. You can view
it on my web site by clicking
below.
http://www.jokelibrary.net/people/f_eld/e1s-well.html
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Subj: Wanting
Sex At Night
One night, as a couple lay
down for bed, the husband gently
taps his wife on the shoulder
and starts rubbing her arm.
The wife turns over and says
"I'm sorry honey, I've got a
gynecologist appointment
tomorrow and I want to stay fresh."
The husband, rejected, turns
over and tries to sleep. A few
minutes later, he rolls back
over and taps his wife again.
This time he whispers in
her ear, "Do you have a dentist
appointment tomorrow too?"
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Subj:
Mother Goose Comic Strip
By Mike Peters
From: Grimmy.com on 8/7/2008 |
Source: http://www.grimmy.com/comics.php
This comic strip deals with
the Ten Commandments.
You can view it on my web
site by clicking below.
http://www.jokelibrary.net/religion/c_to_r/religion1-goose.html
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Subj: Boy
Chokes In Restaurant
From: pns on 11/11/2002
and From: ginafm on 8/5/2008
A father walks into a restaurant
with his young son. He
gives the young boy 3 nickels
to play with to keep him
occupied. Suddenly,
the boy starts choking, going blue
in the face. The father
realizes the boy has swallowed
the nickels and starts slapping
him on the back. The boy
coughs up 2 of the nickels,
but keeps choking. Looking
at his son, the father is
panicking, shouting for help.
A well dressed, attractive,
and serious looking woman, in
a blue business suit is sitting
at a coffee bar reading a
newspaper and sipping a cup
of coffee. At the sound of
the commotion, she looks
up, puts her coffee cup down,
neatly folds the newspaper
and places it on the counter,
gets up from her seat and
makes her way, unhurried, across
the restaurant.
Reaching the boy, the woman
carefully drops his pants;
takes hold of the boy's testicles
and starts to squeeze
and twist, gently at first
and then ever so firmly. After
a few seconds the boy convulses
violently and coughs up
the last nickel, which the
woman deftly catches in her
free hand.
Releasing the boy's testicles,
the woman hands the nickel
to the father and walks back
to her seat in the coffee
bar without saying a word.
As soon as he is sure that
his son has suffered no ill
effects, the father rushes
over to the woman and starts
thanking her saying, "I've
never seen anybody do anything
like that before, it was
fantastic. Are you a doctor?"
"No," the woman replied. "Divorce
attorney."
(cum grano salis)
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Subj:
Opus Comic Strip II
By Berkeley Breathed Sept. 30, 2007
From: Salon.com on 8/7/2008 |
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Source: http://www.salon.com/comics/opus/2007/09/30/opus/
In this Opus Comic Strip,
they discuss bathroom signals.
You can view it at the above
source, or on my web site by
clicking below.
http://www.jokelibrary.net/sex/b_to_h/gays-opus2.html
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Subj: Famous
Men
Did you know who in 1923 was:
1. president of the largest
steel company?
2. President of the largest
gas company?
3. President of the New York
Stock Exchange?
4. Greatest wheat speculator?
5. President of the Bank
of International Settlement?
6. Great Bear of Wall Street?
These men should have been
considered some of the world's most
successful men. At
least they found the secret of making money.
Now more then 55 years later,
do you know what has become of
these men?
1. The President of the largest
steel company, Charles Schwab,
died a pauper.
2. The President of the largest
gas company, Edward Hopson,
is insane.
3. The President of the N.Y.S.E.,
Richard Whitney, was released
from prison
to die at home.
4. The greatest wheat speculator,
Arthur Cooger, died abroad,
penniless.
5. The President of the Bank
of International Settlement shot
himself.
6. The Great Bear of Wall
Street, Cosabee Rivermore, died of
suicide.
The same year, 1923, the winner
of the most important golf
championship, Gene Sarazan,
won the U.S. Open and PGA
Tournaments. Today
he is still playing golf and is solvent.
CONCLUSION: STOP WORRYING
ABOUT BUSINESS AND START PLAYING GOLF.
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Subj:
Puzzle - Hidden Message
From the book
Optical Illusions, page 243
by Keith Kay
Published by
Sterking Publishing Company, Inc., 1997
387 Park Avenue South,
New York, N.Y. 10016 |
Can you find the hidden message
in the drawing. Click below
to see the larger drawing,
hints, and solution.
http://www.jokelibrary.net/education/m_files/m4c-message.html
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Subj: Short
Jokes That Made Me Laugh Or Smile
From: LABLaughsClean on 8/11/08
"Every man's work, whether
it be literature or music
or pictures or architecture
or anything else, is
always a portrait of himself."
-- Samuel Butler
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