.
.
. .
.
Subject: The Sunday Morning Laughs #606c
         Date: 9/14/2008
 

You can also view old ‘Sunday Morning Laughs’ at 
http://jokelibrary.net/archive/index.html
===========================================================
Subj:     Opus Comic Strip
          By Berkeley Breathed on Sept 23, 2007
          From: Salon.com on 8/14/2008
 Source: http://www.salon.com/comics/opus/2007/09/23/opus/

 This Opus comic strip discusses hedge fund managers and 
 school teachers.  You can view this wonderful comic strip 
 at the above source, or on my web site by clicking below.

 http://www.jokelibrary.net/education/after_m/sch-supp2-opus.html

                            \\\//
                           -(o o)-
========================oOO==(_)==OOo======================
Subj:     Johnny Sees Parents Making Love
          From: humorlist-digest V1 #202 on 97-09-18
      and From: rfslick on 8/15/2008

 Little Johnny walks into his parents' room to see his mom
 on top of his dad bouncing up and down.  The mom sees her
 son and quickly dismounts, worried about what her son has
 seen.  She dresses quickly and goes to find him.  The son
 sees his mom and asks, 'What were you and dad doing?' 

 The mother replies, 'Well, you know your dad has a big
 tummy and sometimes I have to get on top of it and help
 flatten it..' 

 'You’re wasting your time,’ said the boy.  'Why is that?'
 the mom asked puzzled.  'Well when you go shopping the
 lady next door comes over and gets on her knees and blows
 it right back up.'

                            \\\//
                           -(o o)-
========================oOO==(_)==OOo======================
Subj:     Peanuts Comic Strip
          By Charles Schultz
          From: Comics.com on 8/13/2008
 Source: http://members.comics.com/members/common
........./affiliateArchive.do?site=washpost&comic=peanuts

 This Peanuts comic strip discusses "why we're put here 
 on Earth."  You can see this strip by clicking below.

 http://www.jokelibrary.net/yNonJokes/thts/l-sp2-peanuts.html

                            \\\//
                           -(o o)-
========================oOO==(_)==OOo======================
Subj:     Abbot Teaches Costello On Computers
          From: humorlist-digest V2 #93 on 98-04-15
      and From: RFSlick on 8/21/2005 and 8/15/2008

 You have to be old enough to remember Abbott and Costello,
 and too old to REALLY understand computers, to fully appreciate
 this.

 If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their infamous
 sketch, "Who's on First?" might have turned out something like
 this:

 COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT

 ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

 COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm
           thinking about buying a computer.

 ABBOTT: Mac?

 COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.

 ABBOTT: Your computer?

 COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.

 ABBOTT: Mac?

 COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.

 ABBOTT: What about Windows?

 COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?

 ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?

 COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?

 ABBOTT: Wallpaper.

 COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.

 ABBOTT: Software for Windows?

 COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to
           write proposals, track expenses and run my business.
           What do you have?

 ABBOTT: Office.

 COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?

 ABBOTT: I just did.

 COSTELLO: You just did what?

 ABBOTT: Recommend something.

 COSTELLO: You recommended something?

 ABBOTT: Yes.

 COSTELLO: For my office?

 ABBOTT: Yes.

 COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?

 ABBOTT: Office.

 COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!

 ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.

 COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let's
           just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to
           type a proposal. What do I need?

 ABBOTT: Word.

 COSTELLO: What word?

 ABBOTT: Word in Office.

 COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.

 ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.

 COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?

 ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue "W".

 COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue "w" if you don't start
          with some straight answers. OK, forget that.  Can I
           watch movies on the Internet?

 ABBOTT: Yes, you want Real One.

 COSTELLO: Maybe a real one, maybe a cartoon.  What I watch is
           none of your business. Just tell me what I need!

 ABBOTT: Real One.

 COSTELLO: If it's a long movie, I also want to watch reels 2,
           3 and 4. Can I watch them?

 ABBOTT: Of course.

 COSTELLO: Great! With what?

 ABBOTT: Real One.

 COSTELLO: OK, I'm at my computer and I want to watch a movie.
           What do I do?

 ABBOTT: You click the blue "1".

 COSTELLO: I click the blue one what?

 ABBOTT: The blue "1".

 COSTELLO: Is that different from the blue w?

 ABBOTT: The blue "1" is Real One and the blue " W" is Word.

 COSTELLO: What word?

 ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.

 COSTELLO: But there are three words in "office for windows"!

 ABBOTT: No, just one. But it's the most popular Word in the world.

 COSTELLO: It is?

 ABBOTT: Yes, but to be fair, there aren't many other Words
         left. It pretty much wiped out all the other Words
         out there.

 COSTELLO: And that word is real one?

 ABBOTT: Real One has nothing to do with Word. Real One isn't
         even part of Office.

 COSTELLO: STOP! Don't start that again. What about financial
           bookkeeping? You hav e anything I can track my
           money with?

 ABBOTT: Money.

 COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?

 ABBOTT: Money.

 COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?

 ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.

 COSTELLO: What's bundled with my computer?

 ABBOTT: Money.

 COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?

 ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.

 COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?

 ABBOTT: One copy.

 COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?

 ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.

 COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?

 ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!

 (A few days later)

 ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

 COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?

 ABBOTT: Click on "START".......

                            \\\//
                           -(o o)-
========================oOO==(_)==OOo======================
Subj:     LOGIC PROB. - Four Blocks
          by Philip J. Carter/Kenneth A. Russell 
          From the book "IQ Test" on 8/15/2008
             Published by Sterling Pub. Co., Inc., in 2008 
             387 Park Avenue South, New York, N.Y. 10016 
             Test #3, Problem #4, Page 49

 Which set of four blocks completes the sequence? 
 Click below to see the picture, the problem's 
 description, and its solution.

 http://www.jokelibrary.net/education/m_files/m4c-blocks.html

                            \\\//
                           -(o o)-
========================oOO==(_)==OOo======================
Subj:     Bird And Elephant Have Sex

 An elephant was having a horrible time in the jungle because
 a horsefly kept biting near her tail and there was nothing
 she could do about it.  It was far out of reach.

 A sparrow saw this and killed the horsefly with its beak.

 "Oh, thank you!" said the elephant.

 "My, pleasure ma'am." said the sparrow.

 "Listen, Mr. Sparrow, if there's anything I can ever do for
 you, don't hesitate to ask."

 The sparrow said, "Well, all my life I wondered how it
 would feel to fuck an elephant."

 "Be my guest!", said the elephant.

 So the sparrow flew behind the elephant and started fucking.
 In the trees above, a monkey in the tree saw this and became
 very excited.  He started to masturbate, shaking a coconut
 loose and it fell from the tree, hitting the elephant on
 the head. "OUCH!", said the elephant.

 Then sparrow looked over from behind and said, "Am I
 hurting you, dear?"

                            \\\//
                           -(o o)-
========================oOO==(_)==OOo=======================
Subj:     Responding With A Weak Hand
          From: BridgeClues.com on 8/14/2008
Drawing from ArtZooks.com

 This wonderful web site has daily problems if you click on 
 the bidding drop down menu.  Today's hand #2093 discusses 
 redoubles during que bids.  Click below to see this
 bridge problem.

 http://www.jokelibrary.net/xOtherAtoM/g2/a_bridge_column62.html

                            \\\//
                           -(o o)-
========================oOO==(_)==OOo======================
.
At Steve Gibbs suggestion I have placed this donate button at
a few key locations on my web site.  If you are sending me
jokes each week, you have already made a donation.
 
Hey, if you sent a quarter each week, I might have some cents.
.
.
Smiley says 'Bye' from
darrell94590 on 9/7/2005

.
.
.