Subject: The
Sunday Morning Laughs #616
Date: 11/23/2008
"They say the seeds of what
we will do are in all of us,
but it always seemed to me
that in those who make jokes
in life the seeds are covered
with better soil and with
a higher grade of manure.
" -- Ernest Hemingway
Thanks for the great jokes you guys
keep sending. If
I haven’t sent out a certain joke
for four years, I am
now sending the best ones out a
second time.
Go to http://jokelibrary.net/a_joke_library.html
to read the great jokes you have
sent me through the years.
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Subj:
Irena Sendler - Holocaust Heroine
From: darrellvip on 10/25/2008
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Source1: http://www.holocaustforgotten.com/sendler.htm
Source2: http://richards-creations.net/Pages
........../8/_Irena-s_Children.html
Source3: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Irena_Sendler
Irena Sendler (in Polish also:
Irena Sendlerowa) was
born February 15, 1910 and
died May 12, 2008. She was
a Polish Catholic social
worker during World War II.
Irena was a member of the
Polish Underground and the
Zegota Polish anti-Holocaust
resistance in Warsaw. She
helped save 2,500 Jewish
children from the Warsaw Ghetto
by providing them with false
documents and sheltering
them in individual and group
children's homes outside
the ghetto. You can
read her amazing story at the
three totally different above
sources, or on my web
site by clicking below.
http://www.jokelibrary.net/nationalities/J/J1-sendler.html
This is a true story as verified
by Snopes.com at
http://www.snopes.com/politics/war/sendler.asp
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Subj:
Sarah Palin Pardons A Turkey
From News.AOL.com on 11/21/2008
Photo from YouTube |
Source1: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e_ybEbrQeOA
Source2: http://news.aol.com/political-machine/2008/11/21/sarah-palin-in-
..........the-silence-of-the-turkeys/?icid=200100397x1213859547x1200902456
Sarah Palin, the former GOP
VP candidate and current Alaska
Governor, was part of perhaps
the most surreal photo-op ever
yesterday. She was
doing the standard "Pardon the Turkey"
routine at Ed Gein's turkey
farm in her home town. After
stepping outside, Sarah did
an interview with the reporter.
She was unconcerned about
the background for the interview.
Ed Gein's slightly less well-adjusted
grand-nephew was
slaughtering turkeys in the
background, while mugging for
the camera. The whole
thing goes on long enough, too, for
the viewer to conjure unfortunate
theories as to what goes
on directly in front of the
slaughterer.
Source2
above is the full interview with gory spots grayed
out.
Source1
above, and my web site accessed by clicking below
is the unedited version of
the video. Unfortunately it has
the song "Shake Your Booty"
by K.C. and The Sunshine Band
playing in the background.
http://jokelibrary.net/xOtherNtoZ/n_to_v/thanksgiving-supp-palin.html
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Subj: Golfer
Looses Ball In Ravine
From: LABLaughsClean on 8/26/2004
One lovely morning, Ben and
Thomas were out golfing. Ben
slices his ball deep into
a wooded ravine. He grabs his
8-iron and proceeds down
the embankment into the ravine in
search of his ball.
Ben searches diligently throughout
the thick underbrush
and suddenly he spots something
shiny. As he gets closer,
he realizes that the shiny
object is in fact an 8-iron in
the hands of a skeleton lying
near an old golf ball.
Ben excitedly calls out to
his golfing partner: "Hey Thomas,
come here, I got big trouble
down here."
Thomas comes running over
to the edge of the ravine and
calls out: "What's the matter
Ben?"
Ben shouts back in a nervous
voice: "Throw me my 7-iron!
Looks like you can't get
out of here with an 8-iron."
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Subj:
F-35B STOVL Flight
From: darrellvip on 10/28/2008
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Source1: http://www.geocities.com/usarmyaviationdigest/jsfspecops.htm
Source2: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/F-35_Lightning_II
The F-35 "Lightning II" Joint
Strike Fighter (JSF) is a
stealth, supersonic, fighter-bomber
which can carry
multiple heavy bombs and
takeoff vertically. Click below
to see three movies about
this amazing aircraft.
http://www.jokelibrary.net/xOtherNtoZ/plane/supp-stovl.html
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Subj:
50 Strange Buildings Of The World
From: darrellvip
on 10/28/2008 |
Source: http://villageofjoy.com/50-strange-buildings-of-the-world/
The architecture on these
50 buildings is amazing, bizarre,
and impressive. You
can view these unique buildings at the
above source, or on my web
site by clicking below.
http://jokelibrary.net/occupations/b_to_l/cc/strange.html
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Subj: Blonde
Waves In Supermarket
From: auntiegah on 12/12/2005
and From: tom on 10/26/2008
A guy goes to a supermarket
and notices a beautiful blonde
wave at him and say hello.
He's rather taken back, because
he can't place where he knows
her from. So he asks, "Do
you know me?”
To which she replies, "I think
you're the father of one of
my children."
Now he thinks back to the
ONLY time he's ever been unfaithful,
and says "My GOD! Are
you the stripper from my bachelor party
that I laid on the pool table
with all my buddies watching,
while your partner whipped
my ass with wet celery and then
stuck a carrot up my butt?".
She said, "No, I'm your son's
math teacher."
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Subj:
Brussels Flower Carpet 2008
From: darrellvip on 10/26/2008
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Source1: http://www.xarj.net/2008/brussels-flower-carpet/
Source2: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q24t1fq3RRg
Source3: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cQIzpvUDihc
Every two years people can
admire the carpet of flowers on
the Grand Place in Brussels.
This year, 700,000 begonias
form the largest tapestry
of the Savonnerie the world.
You can see four photos and
two movies about this wonderful
celebration at the three
above sources, or on my web site
by clicking below.
http://www.jokelibrary.net/nationalities/a_to_z/z_other-brussels.html
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Source: http://www.apuzzlezone.com/adailypuzzle/10-10-08.html
Sheila, buying favors for
a party she was giving, was
having difficulty deciding
on how many more favors to buy.
She started out by planning
to give everyone three favors,
but when she divided the
favors she had by 3, she had one
left over; when she divided
by 4, she had two left over;
by 5, she had three left
over; and by 6, she had four left
over. Since she was
going to have ten guests, this would
not work. She counted
the favors and realized that, by
adding two more, she could
divide the favors evenly. What
is the smallest number of
favors she could already have
bought to meet those specifications?
The solution can be found
on my web site by clicking below.
http://www.jokelibrary.net/education/m2/m4cS-favors.html
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Subj: Farmer
And His Wife Discuss Orgasms
From: LABLaughsAdult on 10/31/2008
A farmer in Arkansas and his
wife were lying in bed one
evening, she was knitting,
and he was reading the latest
issue of Animal Husbandry.
He looks up from the page and
said to her, "Did you know
that humans are the only
species in which the female
achieves orgasm?"
She looks at him wistfully,
smiles, and replies, "Oh yeah?
Prove it."
He frowns for a moment, and
then replied, "O.K." He then
gets up and walks out, leaving
his wife with a confused
look on her face.
About half an hour later he
returns all tired and sweaty
and says, "Well, I'm sure
the cow and sheep didn't, but
the way that pig squealed,
it's hard to tell."
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Subj:
Puzzle - The Quarrelsome Neighbors
From the book
"Mathematical Puzzles of Sam Loyd"
Edited by Martin Gardner
From: Dover Publications in 1959 |
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Can you draw the three paths
correctly? To see the puzzle's
description, it's large drawing
and the puzzle's solution,
click below.
http://www.jokelibrary.net/education/m2/m4cS-neighbors.html
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Subj:
Ann Telnaes Cartoons
From: WashingtonPost.com
on 11/19/2008 |
Source: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/opinions
........./cartoonsandvideos/telnaes/telnaes11192008.swf
You can see this cute, animated
cartoon about the big three
auto makers asking for a
bail out from Congress at the above
source, or on my web site
by clicking below.
http://www.jokelibrary.net/xOtherAtoM/cars/cars-supp-ann.html
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