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Subj:     SuperHero Jokes
                 (Includes 23 jokes and articles, 10 1026n,14,cf,wXT4,11)

Spiderman
from
Animated GIFs Collection
Includes the following:  Nanna Nanna Batman - Drawing (S887)
.........................25 Great Quotes By The Joker - Video (S831)
.........................Batman Movie, The Bomb Scene - Video (S767)
.........................What Makes A Hero? - Matthew Winkler - Video (S830)
.........................New York Subway Hero - Video (S719)
.........................Boy Becomes Superman (S540)
.........................Dubbed Superman Movie Clip (S683)
.........................Two Guys At The Empire State Building (S111, S509b)
.........................Eric Allie Political Cartoon (S616c)
.........................Superman Has Sex (DU)
.........................Bizarro Cartoon (S607b)
.........................Superman Was Feeling Horney (S297b)
.........................Short Superhero Jokes
..............................B.C. Sunday Comic Strip (DU)
..............................Pickles Comic Strip (DU)
..............................Non Sequitur Sunday Comic Strip II (S769)
..............................Bizarro Cartoon II (S895)
..............................Non Sequitur Sunday Comic Strip (S764)
..............................Superfriends Wazzup (S683b)
..............................Superman And The Phone Booth (S677b)

Also see MARRIAGE6    - 'Rekindling A Relationship'
         POLICE1 file - 'Secret Superman' - Painting
         POLIT-SUPP2  - 'Non Sequitur Comic Strip'
         PREGNANT-SUPP- 'Superman's Baby' - Comic Book
         SEX3 file    - 'Thor Has Sex'

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Subj:     Nanna Nanna Batman (S887)
          Drawn by Dave Collinson
          From: George Takei on 12/5/2013
 Source: http://society6.com/davecollinson/Nanna-nanna-bat-man_Print#1=45
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..........You can buy this print at the source for $14.56.
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Subj:     25 Great Quotes By The Joker (S831d)
          From: PonAdidas on 12/13/2012
 Source1: https://www.youtube.com/embed/JrfCRF50qaA
 Source2: http://www.buzzpirates.com/2009/06/the-13-best-quotes-
..........by-the-joker-in-the-dark-night-heath-ledger-lives-on/

 These are the 25 best quotes by The Joker, Heath Ledger,
 from the movie, The Dark Knight Rises.  The Dark Knight
 Rises is a 2012 British-American superhero film directed
 by Christopher Nolan, who co-wrote the screenplay with
 his brother Jonathan Nolan. Click 'HERE' to see the
 25 quotes from the movie.
 

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Subj:     Batman Movie, The Bomb Scene (S767d)
          From: Wimp.com on 9/24/2011
..........At: http://www.wimp.com/funnyfear/

 This video is the classic 'bomb' scene from the original
 1966 Batman Movie starring Adam West and Burt Ward, the
 real dynamic duo.  Click 'HERE' to see this funny,
 exciting scene.

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Subj:     What Makes A Hero?
          By Matthew Winkler (S830d)
 Source1: http://www.wimp.com/makeshero/
 Source2: https://www.youtube.com/embed/Hhk4N9A0oCA
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In this TedEd video, Matthew Winkler
explains the Hero's Journey.  It is
based on the book 'The Hero of a
Thousand Faces' written by Joseph
Campbell.  Matthew takes us step-
by-step through the crucial events
that make or break a hero.
Photo from YouTube.com
.Click 'HERE' to learn the fundamentals of Harry Potter,
 Frodo Baggins, and all heroes.

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Subj:     New York Subway Hero (S719d)
          By Steve Hartman in a CBS News Video
 Source1: http://www.wimp.com/subwayhero/
 Source2: https://www.youtube.com/embed/e9JcX2X7XnM

 A 50-year-old man saved a stranger's life on a New York subway.
 The man was having a seizure, and Wesley Autrey saved him from
 being run over by covering him with his body.  Click 'HERE'
 to see a real hero.

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Subj:     Boy Becomes Superman (S540)
          From: LABLaughsClean on 4/26/2007

 At his request, each morning three-year-old Ray's mother
 pinned a bath towel to the back shoulders of his size two
 T-shirt.

 Immediately in his young imaginative mind the towel became
 a brilliant magic blue and red cape.

 And he became Superman.

 Outfitted each day in his "cape," Ray's days were packed
 with adventure and daring escapades.  He was Superman.

 This fact was clearly pointed out last fall when his
 mother enrolled him in kindergarten class.  During the
 course of the interview, the teacher asked Ray his name.

 "Superman," he answered politely and without pause.

 The teacher smiled, cast an appreciative glance at his
 mother, and asked again, "Your real name, please."

 Again, Ray answered, "Superman."

 Realizing the situation demanded more authority, or maybe
 to hide amusement, the teacher closed her eyes for a moment,
 then in a voice quite stern, said, "I will have to have
 your real name for the records."

 Sensing he'd have to play straight with the teacher, Ray
 slid his eyes around the room, hunched closer to her, and
 patting a corner of frayed towel at his shoulder, answered
 in a voice hushed with conspiracy, "Clark Kent."

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Subj:     Dubbed Superman Movie Clip (S683d)
          From: YouTube.com on 2/13/2010
Drawing from YouTube.com
 Source: https://www.youtube.com/embed/QO8YlPjc7lw

 After the soundtrack of this classic Superman episode
 was urinated on by AEFCN office dog "Tramp", the cast
 set about the task of re-dubbing the voices.  When the
 transcripts of the original scripts were lost, they
 dubbed in what they deduced, based on the action, the
 dialogue should be.

 Perry White turns the "Daily Planet" into a sex magazine
 for old people, Lois Lane is a nympho and Superman is a
 flamer.  Click 'HERE' to see this very funny video.

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Subj:     Two Guys At The Empire State Building (S111, S509b)
          From: cohen#il on 97-10-23
      and From: JBCARY1 on 10/20/2006

 This guy goes up to a bar located at the top of the Empire
 State building in New York.  It looks like a nice place and
 he takes a seat at the bar next to another guy.

 "This is a nice place, I've never been here," the first guy
 says. "Oh really?" the other replies, "it's also a very
 special bar."

 "Why is that?" the first guy asks.

 "Well, you see that painting on the far wall?  That's an
 original Van Gogh, and this stool I'm sitting on was on
 the Titanic."

 "Gee, that's amazing!" the first guy says.

 "Not only that, but you see that window over there, fourth
 from the right?  Well, the wind does strange things outside
 that window.  If you jump out you fall about 50 feet before
 the wind catches you and you're pushed back up."

 "No way, that's impossible," the first guy replies.

 "Not at all, take a look," the other man replies and walks
 over to the window, followed closely by the first man.  He
 opens the window, climbs over the sill and falls out.  He
 drops  10...20...30...40...50 feet, comes to a stop, and
 whoosh!  He comes right back up and sails through the
 window.

 "See, it's fun.  You should try it," he says.

 "Try it?  I don't even believe I saw it!" the first man
 shouts.

 "It's easy.  Watch, I'll do it again."  And with that,
 he falls out the window again. He drops 10...20...30...40
 ...50 feet, comes to a stop, and whoosh!  He comes right
 back up and sails back through the window.

 "Go ahead, give it a try, it's a blast," he says.

 "Well, what the heck.  OK, I'll give it a try," the first
 man says and proceeds to fall out the window.  He falls
 10....20...30...40...50...100...200...300...500...1000
 feet and SPLAT!...ends up as road pizza on the sidewalk
 below.

 After calmly watching the first man fall to his death,
 the other guy casually closes the window and heads back
 to the bar and orders another drink.

 The bartender arrives with the drink and says, "You know
 Superman, you're a real asshole when you're drunk."

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Subj:     Eric Allie Political Cartoon (S616c)
          by Eric Allie on 11/1/2008
 Source: (Removed from townhall.com)

 Click 'HERE' to see this political cartoon.

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Subj:     Superman Has Sex (DU)

 There's this big party on for all the superheroes.  Every-
 one's there.  If they wear their briefs over their tights
 then they've been invited.  Batman arrives late with the
 Boy Wonder, looks around and spies Superman looking all
 sad in the corner.  So he goes over to his old friend to
 try and raise his spirits.  "Hey Clark buddy, whats the
 problem?",he asks."Well Bruce, keep this to yourself, but
 I've really got the hots for Wonderwoman and I was hoping
 to cop off with her tonight, only she hasn't turned up",
 replies Supes coyly.

 "Look If really want her that bad go and find her!!"

 "Yeah I'll do that."  So Superman jumps into the air, up,
 up and away, hunting for his bit.  A few hours later he
 returns to the party and is immediately cornered by Batman.

 "So, what happened?"

 "Well first I flew all the way around America using my
 super vision but couldn't find her.  Then I tried all
 round Europe- still no sign of her.  I zoomed doen to
 Australia but didn't catch a glimpse of a magic head band
 or power Lasso.  I decided to give up and was flying back
 over the Sahara when I saw her lying on the sand, buck
 naked, legs spread and pussy glistening.  Without a
 moments hesitation, I whipped down my leggings, revealing
 my tremendous super stiffy, and flew straight in 'Smack!!'"

 "Did you surprise her?"

 "Not half as much as I did the Invisible man!!!!!!"

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Subj:     Bizarro Cartoon (S607b)
          by Dan Piraro on 8/23/2008
Drawing from Bizarro.com
 Source: http://bizarro.com/comics/august-23-2008/

 This cartoon deals with the modern superhero.
 You can view it by clicking 'HERE'.

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Subj:     Superman Was Feeling Horney (S297b)
          From: coreymac on 10/11/2002

 One day Superman was feeling a bit horny. He began to ask
 his superhero friends for ideas on where he could get a
 bit of action.

 "Hey, Batman!  Who's good in the sack?"

 "Well Superman, everyone knows that Wonderwoman is the
 best sex in Comicland.  Why don't you try her?" replied
 Batman.

 "I'd love to, but Wonderwoman and I are friends, so I
 don't really want to take advantage of her."

 'Damn shame", said Batman as he waved to Superman and
 drove off.

 Ten minutes later Superman was flying low over the city,
 when he saw the Green Lantern patching up a building.  He
 flew down, "Hey Hal, I'm looking for a little action.
 You're a swinging Bachelor, who's the best babe in
 Comicland?"

 "Hey, Superman! Everyone knows Wonderwoman is far and
 away the best in Comicland, why don't you try her?"

 "Well, we're sort of friends," said Superman, "but I
 didn't realize that she had gotten around so much" and
 he flew off in frustration.

 Twenty minutes later he was flying over a field when he
 saw Wonderwoman laying naked in the middle of the field
 with her legs up in the air.  Superman was tempted! "I'm
 faster than a speeding bullet.  I can be in and out of
 there before she ever knew I was there."

 So with a blurr and a sonic boom he was down, in and gone.
 Wonderwoman stared up into the sky with a dazed expression.
 "What the hell was that!?

 "I don't know", said the Invisible Man, "but my ass is
 killing me."


Subj:     Short Superhero Jokes

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Subj:     B.C. Sunday Comic Strip (DU)
          By Mastroianni and Hart on 4/12/2015

 Source: http://www.gocomics.com/bc/2015/04/12
 Click 'HERE' to meet Super Johnny.

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Subj:     Pickles Comic Strip (DU)
          By Brian Crane on 5/25/2012
 Source: http://www.gocomics.com/pickles/2012/05/25
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Subj:     Non Sequitur Sunday Comic Strip II (S769)
          By Wiley Miller on 10/9/2011
 Source: http://www.gocomics.com/nonsequitur/2011/10/09
 (See 'Non Sequitur Sunday Comic Strip' in Polit-Supp2)
 Click 'HERE' to see another adventure of the newest superhero
 in this great Sunday comic strip.
 

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Subj:     Bizarro Cartoon II (S895)
          By Dan Piraro on 4/20/2013
          From: Sam Perkins on Facebook
 Source: http://bizarro.com/comics/april-20-2013
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Subj:     Non Sequitur Sunday Comic Strip (S764)
          By Wiley Miller on 9/4/2011
 Drawing from ArcMax.com
 Source: http://www.gocomics.com/nonsequitur/2011/09/04
 (See 'Non Sequitur Sunday Comic Strip' in Polit-Supp2)
 Click 'HERE' to see an adventure of the newest superhero
 in this great Sunday comic strip.
 

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Subj:     Superfriends Wazzup (S683b,d)
          From: HendersonJrG on 2/6/2010
 Source: https://www.youtube.com/embed/mPbzrhfjlmk
 This video is the Superfriend's Budweiser commercial
 called "Wazzup?"  Click 'HERE' to see this old,
 favorite commercial.
 

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Subj:     Superman And The Phone Booth (S677b)
          From: LABLaughsClean on 12/4/2009
 We took the family to one of those restaurants where the
 walls are plastered with movie memorabilia. I went off to
 see the hostess about reserving a table. When I returned,
 I found my 10- year-old granddaughter staring at a poster
 of Superman standing in a phone booth. She looked puzzled.
 "She doesn't know who Superman is?" I asked my husband.
 "Worse," he replied. "She doesn't know what a phone booth
 is."
 

 What person, not a "Seinfeld" regular cast member,
 is featured on every  episode of "Seinfeld"?
 Superman, either by name or pictures on Jerry's refrigerator.

From: RFSlick on 98-04-30
 How come Superman could stop bullets with his chest,
 but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him?

From: Bawdy.Net Collage #193
 The Answer: a Cockrobin.
 The Question: what are you putting in my mouth, Batman?

From: RFSlick on 98-12-09
 In every episode of Seinfeld there is a Superman somewhere.

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.............................From Smiley_Central.
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