Subj: SuperHero Jokes
(Includes 17 jokes and articles, 23797n,8,cf)
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Subj: SuperHero Jokes (Includes 17 jokes and articles, 23797n,8,cf) |
|
Spiderman from Animated GIFs Collection |
Also see MARRIAGE6
- 'Rekindling A Relationship'
POLIT-SUPP2 - 'Non
Sequitur Comic Strip'
SEX3 file - 'Thor
Has Sex'
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Subj:
Batman Movie, The Bomb Scene (S767)
From: Wimp.com on 9/24/2011 |
This video is the classic 'bomb'
scene from the original
1966 Batman Movie starring Adam
West and Burt Ward, the
real dynamic duo. Click
on either source, or 'HERE'
for my copy, to see this funny,
exciting scene.
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| Subj:
New York Subway Hero (S719)
By Steve Hartman in a CBS News Video From: Wimp.com on 9/18/2010 |
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A 50-year-old man saved a stranger's
life on a New York subway.
The man was having a seizure,
and Wesley Autrey saved him from
being run over by covering him
with his body. Click on either
source, or 'HERE'
for my copy, to see a real hero.
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Subj: Boy
Becomes Superman (S540)
From: LABLaughsClean on 4/26/2007
At his request, each morning
three-year-old Ray's mother
pinned a bath towel to the back
shoulders of his size two
T-shirt.
Immediately in his young imaginative
mind the towel became
a brilliant magic blue and red
cape.
And he became Superman.
Outfitted each day in his "cape,"
Ray's days were packed
with adventure and daring escapades.
He was Superman.
This fact was clearly pointed
out last fall when his
mother enrolled him in kindergarten
class. During the
course of the interview, the
teacher asked Ray his name.
"Superman," he answered politely and without pause.
The teacher smiled, cast an appreciative
glance at his
mother, and asked again, "Your
real name, please."
Again, Ray answered, "Superman."
Realizing the situation demanded
more authority, or maybe
to hide amusement, the teacher
closed her eyes for a moment,
then in a voice quite stern,
said, "I will have to have
your real name for the records."
Sensing he'd have to play straight
with the teacher, Ray
slid his eyes around the room,
hunched closer to her, and
patting a corner of frayed towel
at his shoulder, answered
in a voice hushed with conspiracy,
"Clark Kent."
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Subj:
Dubbed Superman Movie (S683)
From: YouTube.com on 2/13/2010 Drawing from YouTube.com |
After the soundtrack of this
classic Superman episode
was urinated on by AEFCN office
dog "Tramp", the cast
set about the task of re-dubbing
the voices. When the
transcripts of the original
scripts were lost, they
dubbed in what they deduced,
based on the action, the
dialogue should be.
Perry White turns the "Daily
Planet" into a sex magazine
for old people, Lois Lane is
a nympho and Superman is a
flamer. Click on the above
source, or 'HERE' for my copy,
to see this very funny video.
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Subj: Two
Guys At The Empire State Building (S111, S509b)
From: cohen#il on 97-10-23
and
From: JBCARY1 on 10/20/2006
This guy goes up to a bar located
at the top of the Empire
State building in New York.
It looks like a nice place and
he takes a seat at the bar next
to another guy.
"This is a nice place, I've never
been here," the first guy
says. "Oh really?" the other
replies, "it's also a very
special bar."
"Why is that?" the first guy asks.
"Well, you see that painting
on the far wall? That's an
original Van Gogh, and this
stool I'm sitting on was on
the Titanic."
"Gee, that's amazing!" the first guy says.
"Not only that, but you see that
window over there, fourth
from the right? Well,
the wind does strange things outside
that window. If you jump
out you fall about 50 feet before
the wind catches you and you're
pushed back up."
"No way, that's impossible," the first guy replies.
"Not at all, take a look," the
other man replies and walks
over to the window, followed
closely by the first man. He
opens the window, climbs over
the sill and falls out. He
drops 10...20...30...40...50
feet, comes to a stop, and
whoosh! He comes right
back up and sails through the
window.
"See, it's fun. You should try it," he says.
"Try it? I don't even believe
I saw it!" the first man
shouts.
"It's easy. Watch, I'll
do it again." And with that,
he falls out the window again.
He drops 10...20...30...40
...50 feet, comes to a stop,
and whoosh! He comes right
back up and sails back through
the window.
"Go ahead, give it a try, it's a blast," he says.
"Well, what the heck. OK,
I'll give it a try," the first
man says and proceeds to fall
out the window. He falls
10....20...30...40...50...100...200...300...500...1000
feet and SPLAT!...ends up as
road pizza on the sidewalk
below.
After calmly watching the first
man fall to his death,
the other guy casually closes
the window and heads back
to the bar and orders another
drink.
The bartender arrives with the
drink and says, "You know
Superman, you're a real asshole
when you're drunk."
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| Subj:
Eric Allie Political Cartoon (S616c)
by Eric Allie From: Townhall.com on 11/1/2008 |
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Click 'HERE' to see this political cartoon.
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Subj: Superman
Has Sex (DU)
There's this big party on for
all the superheroes. Every-
one's there. If they wear
their briefs over their tights
then they've been invited.
Batman arrives late with the
Boy Wonder, looks around and
spies Superman looking all
sad in the corner. So
he goes over to his old friend to
try and raise his spirits.
"Hey Clark buddy, whats the
problem?",he asks."Well Bruce,
keep this to yourself, but
I've really got the hots for
Wonderwoman and I was hoping
to cop off with her tonight,
only she hasn't turned up",
replies Supes coyly.
"Look If really want her that bad go and find her!!"
"Yeah I'll do that." So
Superman jumps into the air, up,
up and away, hunting for his
bit. A few hours later he
returns to the party and is
immediately cornered by Batman.
"So, what happened?"
"Well first I flew all the way
around America using my
super vision but couldn't find
her. Then I tried all
round Europe- still no sign
of her. I zoomed doen to
Australia but didn't catch a
glimpse of a magic head band
or power Lasso. I decided
to give up and was flying back
over the Sahara when I saw her
lying on the sand, buck
naked, legs spread and pussy
glistening. Without a
moments hesitation, I whipped
down my leggings, revealing
my tremendous super stiffy,
and flew straight in 'Smack!!'"
"Did you surprise her?"
"Not half as much as I did the Invisible man!!!!!!"
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Subj:
Bizarro Comics (S607b)
by Dan Piraro on 8/23/2008 Drawing from Bizarro.com |
This comic strip deals with the
modern superhero.
You can view it by clicking
'HERE'.
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Subj: Superman
Was Feeling Horney (S297b)
From: coreymac on 10/11/2002
One day Superman was feeling
a bit horny. He began to ask
his superhero friends for ideas
on where he could get a
bit of action.
"Hey, Batman! Who's good in the sack?"
"Well Superman, everyone knows
that Wonderwoman is the
best sex in Comicland.
Why don't you try her?" replied
Batman.
"I'd love to, but Wonderwoman
and I are friends, so I
don't really want to take advantage
of her."
'Damn shame", said Batman as
he waved to Superman and
drove off.
Ten minutes later Superman was
flying low over the city,
when he saw the Green Lantern
patching up a building. He
flew down, "Hey Hal, I'm looking
for a little action.
You're a swinging Bachelor,
who's the best babe in
Comicland?"
"Hey, Superman! Everyone knows
Wonderwoman is far and
away the best in Comicland,
why don't you try her?"
"Well, we're sort of friends,"
said Superman, "but I
didn't realize that she had
gotten around so much" and
he flew off in frustration.
Twenty minutes later he was flying
over a field when he
saw Wonderwoman laying naked
in the middle of the field
with her legs up in the air.
Superman was tempted! "I'm
faster than a speeding bullet.
I can be in and out of
there before she ever knew I
was there."
So with a blurr and a sonic boom
he was down, in and gone.
Wonderwoman stared up into the
sky with a dazed expression.
"What the hell was that!?
"I don't know", said the Invisible
Man, "but my ass is
killing me."
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Subj: Short
Superhero Jokes
| Subj:
Non Sequitur Sunday Comic Strip II (S769)
By Wiley Miller From: WashingtonPost.com on 10/9/2011 |
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Subj:
Non Sequitur Sunday Comic Strip (S764)
By Wiley Miller From: WashingtonPost.com on 9/5/2011 |
| Subj:
Superfriends Wazzup (S683b)
From: HendersonJrG on 2/6/2010 |
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Subj: Superman
And The Phone Booth (S677b)
From: LABLaughsClean on 12/4/2009
We took the family to one of
those restaurants where the
walls are plastered with movie
memorabilia. I went off to
see the hostess about reserving
a table. When I returned,
I found my 10- year-old granddaughter
staring at a poster
of Superman standing in a phone
booth. She looked puzzled.
"She doesn't know who Superman
is?" I asked my husband.
"Worse," he replied. "She doesn't
know what a phone booth
is."
What person, not a "Seinfeld"
regular cast member,
is featured on every episode
of "Seinfeld"?
Superman, either by name or
pictures on Jerry's refrigerator.
From: RFSlick on 98-04-30
How come Superman could stop
bullets with his chest,
but always ducked when someone
threw a gun at him?
From: Bawdy.Net Collage #193
The Answer: a Cockrobin.
The Question: what are you putting
in my mouth, Batman?
From: RFSlick on 98-12-09
In every episode of Seinfeld
there is a Superman somewhere.
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