Subj:....Hillbilly Medical Terms
         From: darrell94590
         on 8/31/2005

 
 

  Benign......................What you be after you be eight. 
Bacteria.....................Back door to cafeteria. 
Barium......................What you do with dead folks. 
Cesarean Section.......A neighborhood in Rome. 
Catscan.....................Searching for the cat.
  Cauterize..........Made eye contact with her. 
Colic.................A sheep dog.
Coma................A punctuation mark. 
D&C.................Where Washington is. 
Dilate................To live longer than your kids do.
Enema..............Not a friend.
Fester...............Quicker than someone else. 
Fibula...............A small lie.
G.I.Series..........World Series of military baseball.
Hangnail...........What you hang your coat on. 
  Hospital..............The biggest building in town, other than
                          Joe's feed warehouse or Franks lumber mill.
Impotent.............Distinguished, well known. 
Labor Pain..........Getting hurt at work. 
Morbid................A higher offer than I bid. 
Medical Staff.............A Doctor's cane, sometimes shown with a snake.
Nitrates......................Cheaper than day rates.
Node..........................I knew it. 
Outpatient.................A person who has fainted.
Pap Smear.................A fatherhood test.
Pelvis.........................Second cousin to Elvis. 
Post Operative...........A letter carrier.
Recovery Room.........Place to do upholstery. 
Secretion....................Hiding something 
Seizure.....................Roman emperor who lived
                               in the Ceasarean Section.
Tablet......................A small table to change babies on.
Terminal Illness.......Getting sick at the train station.
Tumor.....................More than one. 
Urine.......................Opposite of mine. 
Varicose..................Near by! ;

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