Subj: Sex-Supp Jokes
(Includes 27 jokes, 14757,19,cf)
Shadow sex from
Free Animated Pics
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Subj: Sex-Supp Jokes (Includes 27 jokes, 14757,19,cf) |
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Shadow sex from Free Animated Pics |
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Subj:
Robin Williams - Weapons Of Self Destruction (S757)
From: FFXIVPro.com on 7/14/2011 |
This is the last joke done by
Robin Williams at his Weapons
of Self Destruction show.
The joke is a tribute to Walter
Cronkite and his love for blue
jokes. In the joke little
Timmy walks into his parents
bedroom during sex. Click on
either source, or 'HERE'
for my copy, to listen and see
this wonderful, dirty joke.
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Subj:
Little Johnny Sees His Parents (S628)
From: LABLaughsAdult on 1/19/2009 Little Johnny from Yahoo! Images |
One day little Johnny heard a
noise and peeked into his
parents room to check it out.
He opened the door to see
his mom bent over the dresser
and dad going at it behind
her. Johnny's dad saw
him and gave him a little wink as
Johnny closed the door.
After business was finished Dad
went to check on little
Johnny. He opened his
bedroom door to find Grandma bent
over the dresser and little
Johnny going at it behind her.
Dad yelled, 'Johnny, what the hell are you doing?!'
Little Johnny replied, 'It's
not so funny when it’s your
mom is it?'
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| Subj:
MadTV's Best Skit! (S711)
From: YouTube.com on 8/28/2010 |
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Click on the above source, or
'HERE'
for my copy, to
see this very funny video.
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Subj: Sex
With A Nymphomaniac (S594)
From: LABLaughsAdult on 6/11/2008
Jon was looking for a little
"action." He picked up a sweet
young thing at the bar and took
her back to his hotel room.
Little did he know that she was
darn near a nymphomaniac.
After six times having sex,
she was screaming for more.
After the eighth time, Jon told
her that he needed to slip
out for a pack of cigarettes.
On the way out, he stopped into
the men's room. He stood
in front of the urinal, unzipped
his pants, and felt a
moment of panic when he couldn't
find his tool.
After a couple of minutes fishing
around, he finally said,
"Look, it's okay. She's not
here!"
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Subj:
Fake Sprite Commercial From Germany - XX (S706)
From: sfo_pilot on 7/28/2010 (in Headlines/Ads-Supp) |
This thirty-two second, fake
Sprite commercial from Germany
is porn. Don't watch it if porn
offends you. Click on either
source, or 'HERE'
for my copy, to see this dirty video.
The Coke company has said they
did NOT make this commercial.
You can see the news media's
reaction to this fake ad at
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EFi1zlctlYI
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Subj: George
Burns And Oprah Have Sex (S504c, S697)
From: darrell94590 on 9/20/2006
and
From: allenbergman on 5/24/2010
When George Burns was 97 years
old he was interviewed by
Oprah Winfrey.
Oprah asked, George, how do you
carry so much energy with
you? You are always working
and at your age I think that
is remarkable. George
said, I just take good care of my-
self and enjoy what I do when
I do it.
Oprah said, I understand you
still do the sex thing too,
even at your age. George
said, of course I still do the
sex thing and I am quite good
at it. Oprah said, I have
never been with an older man,
would you do it with me?
So they had sex and when they
finished, Oprah said, I just
don't believe I have ever been
so satisfied, you are truly
a remarkable man.
George told her that the second
time is even better than
the first. Oprah said,
You mean you can really do it again,
even at your age?
George said, Just let me sleep
for 1/2 hour. You hold my
testicles in your left hand
and my penis in your right hand
and wake me up in thirty minutes.
When she woke him up, they again
had great sex and Oprah
was beside herself with joy.
She said, Oh George, I am
astounded that you could do
a repeat performance and have
it be better than the first
time. At your age, Oh My, Oh My!!!
George, said that the third time
would be even better. You
just hold my testicles in your
left hand and my penis in your
right hand and call me in thirty
minutes. Oprah asked, does
my holding and touching you
kind of recharge your batteries?
George said, hell no, but the
last time I had sex with a black
woman she stole my wallet!
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| Subj:
Two Girls In Bikinis In A Car (S681)
By Segredos da Amazonia on 1/29/2010 From: darrellvip on 1/28/2010 |
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This commercial is very funny
and provocative. Click
on the above source, or 'HERE'
for my copy, to see to
see this sensual video.
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Subj: Car
Wash Vacuum Sex (S626c)
From: LABLaughsAdult on 1/7/2009
Source: http://digg.com/odd_stuff/Police_Arrest_Mich_Man_For_Car_Wash_Vacuum_Sex
THOMAS TOWNSHIP, Mich. (AP) --
Police say a Michigan man
has been \ arrested after "receiving
sexual favors from a
vacuum" at a car wash.
The Saginaw News reports the
29-year-old Swan Creek Township
man was arrested Thursday in
Saginaw County's Thomas Township,
about 90 miles northwest of
Detroit. Police Sgt. Gary
Breidinger says a resident called
to report suspicious
activity at the car wash about
6:45 a.m. An officer
approached on foot and caught
the man in the act.
The suspect, whose name wasn't
immediately released, is
being held in the Saginaw
County Jail.
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Subj: 40 Things You Should
Know About Sex by Age 40 (S661)
From: AOL.com on 9/12/2009 Photo from jupiterimages |
I've got to admit I didn't know
half of these facts. Click
on the above source, or 'HERE'
for my copy, and you too can
be enlightened.
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Subj: Jack
The Optimist (S621c)
From: LABLaughsAdult on 12/3/2008
Once, in a small town, lived
a man named Jack. Everyone
in town knew Jack was very optimistic
-- even if a
situation was terrible, Jack
could always think of a way
it could be worse. Everyone
in the town was tired of
hearing Jack say that, so one
day they decided to to lie
to Jack.
"Jack, the baker Bob found his
wife in bed with another
man last night! He shot the
man and then himself! Isn't
that terrible?"
"Sure, it's terrible, but it could've been worse!"
"How could THAT possibly have been worse?"
"Well, if it had been the night
before I would've
been dead!"
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Subj: A Dirty
Riddle (S596)
From: LABLaughsClean on 6/15/2008
To make it stand,
You wet it !
To make it wet,
You suck it !
To make it stiff,
You lick it !
To get it in,
You push it!
Damn !
Threading a needle when you're older is a BITCH!
\\\//
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| Subj:
Sex Track Race (S564c)
From: edapsmas on 11/14/2007 |
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Subj: Sex
Bar Tab (S553b)
From: LABLaughsAdult on 8/21/2007
This is fun to do. The
only catch is that you can't ask
the person who posted it anything
about it! :) Just read
the "offense" and if you've
done it, you owe that fine.
Keep going until you've read
each "offense" and added up
your total fine. Title
your bulletin "My Bar Tab is$..."
You don't have to confess your
answers, just the amount
of your fine.
Smoked pot -- $20
Did acid -- $10
Ever had sex at church -- $10
Woke up in the morning and did
not know the person
who was next to you-- $50
Had sex with someone on MySpace -- $30
Had sex for money -- $200
Ever had sex with the a Puerto Rican -- $25
Vandalized something -- $27
Had sex on your parents' bed -- $40
Beat up someone -- $100
Been jumped -- $20
Crossed dressed -- $11
Given money to stripper -- $30
Been in love with a stripper -- $25
Kissed some one who's name you
didn't
know --$16
Hit on some one of the same sex
while
at work-- $22
Ever drive drunk -- $21
Ever got drunk at work, or went
to work
while still drunk -- $59
Used toys while having sex -- $40
Got drunk, passed out and don't remember the night before -- $20
Went skinny dipping -- $30
Had sex in a pool -- $10
Kissed someone of the same sex -- $5
Had sex with someone of the same sex -- $10
Cheated on your significant other -- $10
Masturbated -- $10
Cheated on your significant other
with their
relative or close friend --$20
Done oral -- $5
Got oral -- $5
Done / got oral in a car while it was moving-- $25
Stole something -- $10
Had sex with someone in jail -- $25
Made a nasty home video -- $15
Had a threesome -- $50
Had sex in the wild -- $20
Been in the same room while someone was having sex -- $25
Stole something worth over more than a hundred dollars -- $20
Had sex with someone 10 years older -- $20
Had sex with someone under 21 and you are over 27 -- $25
Been in love with two people or more at the same time -- $50
Said you love someone but didn't mean it -- $25
Went streaking -- $5
Went streaking in broad daylight -- $15
Been arrested -- $5
Spent time in jail -- $15
Played spin the bottle -- $5
Done something you regret -- $20
Had sex with your best friend -- $20
Had sex with someone you work with at work --$25
Had anal sex -- $80
Lied to your mate -- $5
Lied to your mate about the sex being good --$25
Tally it up and Title it..."My Bar Tab Is
--------------------------
Lorraine's Bar Tab is $333
Al's Bar Tab is $489
Now I know I've lived a sheltered
life, so you can surely
get a score above $600.
What are your scores Sam, Roger,
Darrell, Mary, and Gina?
\\\//
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Subj: Short
Sex Jokes
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Subj:
Sex At 83! (S717)
From: lubin100 on 10/14/2010 Drawing from Susty.com |
Top
Subj: Screwing
Twins (S756)
From: virv on 7/12/2011
A friend of mine has just told
me he's screwing his
girlfriend and her twin.
I asked, "How can you tell them
apart?"
He said, "Her brother has a
mustache."
| Subj:
Global Facts About Sex (S716b)
From: tom on 10/6/2010 Drawing
from NZGirl.co.nz...
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Subj:
If Sex Were An Olympic Event (S624c)
From: LABLaughsAdult on 12/26/2008 |
| Subj:
Medical Warning (622c)
From: gattica30 on 12/9/2008 |
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Subj:
Stamp Collecting (S611b)
From: rfslick on 9/6/2008 |
| Subj:
Are You Lonely (S555c)
From: LABLaughsAdult on 9/7/2007 |
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Subj:
Sexy Calendar (S554b)
From: LABLaughsAdult on 8/29/2007 |
| Subj:
New Sex Study (S530c in Marriage2)
From: darrell94590 on 3/14/2007 |
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Subj:
Sex Flow Chart (S526b)
From: edbabcock on 2/16/2007 |
| Subj:
There's More To Life Than Sex (S523b)
From: LABLaughsClean on 1/24/07 |
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Subj:
The Sex Alphabet (S502b)
From: LABLaughsAdult on 8/31/2006 |
| Subj:
Fantastic Adult Toy (S502b)
From: darrell94590 on 9/6/2006 |
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Subj:
Lost Piece (S493)
From: LABLaughsAdult on 7/9/2007 |
| Subj:
Nursing Home Orgy (S584c in Eld3-Supp)
From: LABLaughsAdult on 3/13/2008 |
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A group of nine love-hungry codgers
were kicked out of an old
folks home in London for having
an orgy. You can read the
newspaper article at the above
source, or on my web site by
clicking 'HERE'.
From: http://www.quotationspage.com/qotd.html
on 10/17/2007
An intellectual is a person
who has discovered something
more interesting than sex.
-- Aldous Huxley (1894 - 1963)
From: darrellvip on 2/20/2008 (S579b)
When I was born , God gave me
2 choices ..
1: I could
have a great memory ...
2: or....I could
be great in bed ...
SHIT !
Now I forgot what I was going
to tell you ..
From: sam.hutkins on 9/10/2009 (S664b
in Black2)
Source: http://www.ronn.com/jokes1.html
Boy asks his mom "Why am I black
and YOU are white?
She says, "Don't even go there.
The way that f'ing party went
you're lucky you don't bark!"
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Smiley sex
From: RFSlick on 6/11/2005 |
