(Includes 22 jokes and articles, 29778,21,cf)
Santa Waving from
WebDeveloper.com
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Christmas-Supp Jokes
(Includes 22 jokes and articles, 29778,21,cf) |
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Santa Waving from WebDeveloper.com |
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Subj:
Grandma Got Molested At The Airport (S724)
From: tom on 12/16/2010 Drawing from TimTim.com |
Hilarious TSA Parody, Sung to
the tune "Grandma Got
Ran Over by a Reindeer".
An original song parody
by Donny Aldridge. He
is a very funny Singer/
songwriter, and political satirist.
Click on either
source, or 'HERE'
for my copy, to hear this funny,
and all too true song.
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Red Skelton - The Littlest Christmas Tree
From: Rebecca Champion on 12/17/2011 (S777) Drawing
from SmallDeadAnimals.com...
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I have enjoyed this skit since
I was little. Mom played it
every year on our record player!!
You can enjoy this audio
recording by Red Skelton with
a series of pictures at either
of the top two sources, or you
can just listen to the original
audio recording at the third
source, or by clicking 'HERE'
for my copy.
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Subj:
Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer (S724)
From: darrellvip on 12/17/2010 Drawing from Loadtr.com |
For many long years, Santa Claus
was associated with eight
reindeer. Then, in 1939,
Robert L. May added a ninth and
a new Christmas tradition was
born. Click on the either
source, or 'HERE'
for my copy, to read the origin of this
modern day classic.
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The Christmas Can-Can (S724)
By Straight No Chaser From: hilary.miller05 on 12/13/2010 |
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Straight No Chaser (SNC) is the
name of two related but
separate a cappella men's singing
groups. The Indiana
University amateur college group
now known as "Indiana
University's Straight No Chaser"
is composed of 10 to
12 undergraduate men whose lineup
changes every year.
The professional group, known
simply as Straight No
Chaser, is composed of former
members, mostly original
members, of the college group.
Click on either source, or 'HERE'
for my copy, to see
and hear this great original
song and group.
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Subj:
GIGGLE With The GOATS In A
Jingle Bells Holiday Performance (S724) From: hilary.miller05 on 12/13/2010 |
Laugh along with us at the funny
antics of these young
cashmere goats. Enjoy
their
natural playfulness and
gymnastic moves as they explore
their new world with
their brothers, sisters, and
friends. To see four
more cute goat videos go to
www.GIGGLEwiththeGOATS.com.
Click on the above source, or
'HERE'
for my copy, to see
'GIGGLE with the GOATS Jingle
Bells Holiday Performance."
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A Christmas eCard For 2010 (S724)
By American Greetings From: darrellvip on 12/9/2010 |
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This eCard from American Greetings
is titled "Christmas Magic."
Click on either source, or 'HERE'
for my copy, to see this cute
Christmas greeting card.
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Christmas Food Court Flash Mob, Hallelujah Chorus (S725)
From: kgilmour2000 on 11/28/2010 |
On Nov.13 2010 unsuspecting shoppers
got a big surprise
while enjoying their lunch.
Over 100 participants in this
awesome Christmas Flash Mob.
This flash mob was organized
by http://www.AlphabetPhotography.com
to wish everyone a
very Merry Christmas!
Click on the above source, or 'HERE'
for my copy to see this wonderfully
touching moment.
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| Subj:
A Christmas Card (S673b)
From: darrellvip on 12/21/2009 |
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Click on the above source, or
'HERE'
for my copy, to see
beautiful animated Christmas
card.
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Subj:
Ashland College Christmas Gift (S673)
From: AFine963 on 12/23/2009 |
This SWF movie is amazing to
watch. The graphics and music
are quite pleasant. You
can see it on the source above, or
on my web site by clicking 'HERE'.
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Mr. Bean Christmas (S672)
From: Wimp.com on 12/19/2009 Source: http://www.wimp.com/beanchristmas/ |
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Click on the above source, or
'HERE'
for my copy, to see
this cute, old, holiday video.
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Subj: An Italian
Christmas Date (S571b)
From: tom on 12/28/2007
I thought it would be a nice
idea to bring a date to my
parents' house on Christmas
Eve. I thought it would be
interesting for a non-Italian
girl to see how an Italian
family spends the holidays.
I thought my mother and my date
would hit it off like
partridges and pear trees.....I
was wrong! I had only
known Karen for three weeks
when I extended the invitation.
"I know these family things
can be a little weird," I told
her, "but my folks are great,
and we always have a lot of
fun on Christmas Eve."
"Sounds fine to me," Karen said.
I told my mother I'd be bringing
Karen with me. "She's a
very nice girl and she's really
looking forward to meeting
all of you."
"Sounds fine to me," my mother said.
And that was that.
Two telephone calls. Two
sounds-fine-to-me. What more could
I want? I should point
out, I suppose, that in Italian
households, Christmas Eve is
the social event of the season
-- an Italian woman's reason
for living. She cleans. She
cooks. She bakes.
She orchestrates every minute of the
entire evening. Christmas
Eve is what Italian women live for.
I should also point out, I suppose,
that when it comes to the
kind of women that make Italian
men go nuts, Karen is it.
She doesn't clean. She doesn't
cook. She doesn't bake. And
she has the largest breasts
I have ever seen on a human being!
I brought her anyway.
7 p.m. - We arrive.
Karen and I walk in and putter
around for half an hour waiting
for the other guests to show
up. During that half hour, my
mother grills Karen like cheeseburger
on the barbecue
determines that Karen does not
clean, cook, or bake.
My father is equally observant.
He pulls me into the living
room and notes, "She has the
largest breasts I have ever seen
on a human being!"
7:30 p.m. - Others arrive.
Zio Giovanni walks in with my
Zia Maria, assorted kids,
assorted gifts. We sit
around the dining room table for
antipasto, a symmetrically composed
platter of lettuce,
roasted peppers, black olives,
anchovies and cheese....no
meat of course. When I
offer to make Karen's plate she says,
"No Thank you." She points
to the anchovies with a look of
disgust.... "You don't like
anchovies?" I ask. "I don't like
fish, Karen announces to one
and all as 67 other varieties of
seafood are baking, broiling
and simmering in the next room.
My mother makes the sign of
the cross.
Things are getting uncomfortable.
Zia Maria asks Karen what
her family eats on Christmas
Eve. Karen says, "Knockwurst."
My father, who is still staring
in a daze, at Karen's chest,
temporarily snaps out of it
to murmur, "Knockers?"
My mother kicks him so hard he gets a blood clot.
None of this is turning out the way I'd hoped.
8:00 p.m. - Second course. The
spaghetti and crab sauce is
on the way to the table.
Karen declines the crab sauce and
says she'll make her own with
butter and ketchup. My mother
asks me to join her in the kitchen.
I take my "Merry
Christmas" napkin from my lap,
place it on the "Merry
Christmas" tablecloth and walk
into the kitchen.
"I don't want to start any trouble,"
my mother says calmly,
clutching a bottle of ketchup
in her hands. "But if she
pours this on my pasta, I'm
going to throw acid in her face."
"Come on," I tell her. "It's
Christmas. Let her eat what
she wants."
My mother considers the situation, then nods.
As I turn to walk back into the
dining room, she grabs my
shoulder. "Tell me the
truth," she says, "are you serious
with this tramp?"
"She's not a tramp," I reply.
"And I've only known her for
three weeks." "Well, it's
your life," she tells me, "but
if you marry her, she'll poison
you."
8:30 p.m. - More fish.
My stomach is knotted like one
of those macrame' plant
hangers that are always three
times larger than the plants
they hold. All the women
get up to clear away the spaghetti
dishes, except for Karen, who,
instead, lights a cigarette.
"Why don't you give them a little
hand?" I politely suggest.
Karen makes a face and walks
into the kitchen carrying three
forks.
"Dear, you don't have to do that,"
my mother tells her,
smiling painfully. "Oh, okay,"
Karen says, putting the forks
on the sink. As she reenters
the dining room, a wine glass
flies over her head, and smashes
against the wall. From the
kitchen, my mother says, "Whoops."
More fish comes out. After
some goading, Karen tries a piece
of scungilli, which she describes
as "slimy, like worms."
My mother winces, bites her
hand and pounds her chest like
one of those old women you always
see in the sixth row of a
funeral home.
Zia Maria does the same.
Karen, believing that this is
something that all Italian women
do on Christmas Eve, bites
her hand and pounds her chest.
My Zio Giovanni doesn't
know what to make of it.
My father's dentures fall out and
chew a six-inch gash in the
tablecloth.
10:00 pm. - Coffee, dessert.
Espresso all around. A
little anisette. A curl of lemon
peel. When Karen asks
for milk, my mother finally slaps her
in the face with a cannoli.
I guess it had to happen sooner
or later. Karen, believing
that this is something that all
Italian women do on Christmas
Eve, picks up a cannoli and
slaps my mother with it.
"This is fun," Karen says.
Time passes and believe it or
not, everyone is laughing and
smiling and filled with good
cheer - even my mother, who
grabs me by the shoulder, laughs
and says, "Get this bitch
out of my house."
Sounds fine to me.
THE END---- If you aren't in
stitches by now, you don't
know Italians!!
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Subj:
Regifting Robin (S673, S778)
From: lindababcockscat on 12/16/2009 and From: tom on 12/28/2011 |
Regifting Robin will guess the
gift you plan to give away.
Click on the above source, or
'HERE'
for my copy, to see
this cute trick.
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Subj: Boy
Steals Baby Jesus (S570b)
From: darrellvip on 12/26/2007
It was the day AFTER Christmas
at a church in San Francisco.
The Pastor of the church was
looking at the manger scene,
when he noticed that the baby
Jesus figure was missing from
the cradle. He immediately
went outside and saw a little
boy with a red wagon walking
down the Street, and in the
wagon, was the figure of the
infant Jesus.
So he walked up to the boy and
said, "Son, where did you
get that little baby Jesus that’s
in your wagon?"
The little boy replied, "I got him from the church.".
"And why did you take him?" asked the pastor.
The little boy replied, "Well,
about a week before Christmas,
I prayed and I told Jesus if
he would bring me a red wagon
for Christmas, I would give
him a ride in it!"
“Merry Christmas To All"
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Subj: Short
Christmas Jokes (S151)
Top
Subj: Snoopy
And Woodstock At Christmas (S777)
From: Socorro Bell
Source1: Tumblr.com
Source2: Wall
Photos in Facebook
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Subj:
Simon's Cat in 'Fowl Play' (S777)
From: Diane J Swinehart on 12/17/2011 Drawing from YouTube.com |
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Garfield Comic Strip (S725)
By Jim Davis From: WashingtonPost.com on 12/19/2010 |
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Subj:
Peanuts Comic Strip (S725)
By Charles M. Schulz From: WashingtonPost.com on 12/19/2010 |
Top
Subj: Hanukkah,
Christmas, Kwanzaa Message (S778)
Jim Farris on 12/20/2011
Source: Facebook
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The Flying McCoys Cartoon (S674)
by Glenn and Gary McCoy From: GoComics.com on 12/28/2009 |
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Subj:
A Christmas Wish (S670b)
From: darrellvip on 11/12/2009 |
| Subj:
Dirty Christmas Wrapping Paper (S620b)
From: ginafm on 11/21/2008 |
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Subj:
Woods Family Christmas Card (S672 in Famous2)
From: tom on 12/18/2009 |
Click 'HERE'
to see the Woods family Christmas card.
Top
Subj: Google:
Let It Snow (S777)
From: Patricia Randall
Source: Wall
Photos in Facebook
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This only
works with the newer version, Google Chrome.
Arrow from Affiliates-Links |
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Smiley Snowboards from
CorvetteForm.com |
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