Subj: Patent And Copyrights Jokes
(Includes 15 jokes and articles, 13870n,4,cf,md4b,3)
Also see ASIAN-SUPP - 'Zip
Bags From Japan' - Movie
BREAST file - 'New Bra Invented In Texas'
CARS1 file - 'Greenberg Brothers Invern AC'
HEAVEN1 file - 'Henry Ford Goes To Heaven'
HOWTO-SUPP - 'TED - Massimo Banzi Explains Arduino' - Movie
MEN1 file - 'The Watch'
OTH-ANIM-SUPP- 'Theo Jansen's Strandbeests' - Movie
NATIVE-AMERIC- 'Edison Visits An Indian Reservation'
WORD_JOKES1 - 'The First Human Clone'
25 Accidental Inventions (S856d)
From: Mel's Video on 6/2/2013
Photo from YouTube.com...
Inventions that no one actually
intended to invent. From
dynamite to Penicillin these are the top 25 accidental
inventions that changed the world. Click on either source,
or 'HERE' for my copy, to see this important list.
Subj: The Work Of The Invernor (S234)
Quote by Francis Bacon
From: the book "The Light of Other Days", page 307
By Arthur C. Clark, published by TOR (c) 2000
"The good effects wrought by
founders of cities, law-givers,
fathers of the people, extirpators of tyrants, and heroes
of that class, extend but for short times: whereas the work
of the Inventor, though a thing of less pomp and show, is
felt everywhere and lasts forever."
Modern Furniture (S786d)
From: Wimp.com on 2/6/2012
Photo from YouTube.com
These new furniture creations
are amazing. Click on
either source, or 'HERE' for my copy, to see this
great, but sometimes fuzzy video.
Subj: U.S.Patent Office And The Apple (S207, S622b)
After patiently waiting for hours,
a man is let into the U.S.
Patent Office to a demonstration of his new invention. "What
do you have to show me," the officer asks. The inventor
pulls a red apple from his pocket and hands it to the patent
officer. Shaking his head in the patent officer informs the
man that an apple is hardly a new invention.
"You don't understand," the man
says. "This is a special
hybrid that I have developed myself. Take a bite out of it
and tell me what you think." The patent officer, unsure but
curious, takes a bite out of the apple.
"Big deal," he says. "It tastes like an apple."
"Turn it around and take another
bite," says the inventor.
The officer takes a bite out of other side and his expression
turns to disbelief. "I don't belive it," he says. "It has
the taste and texture of an orange. The inventor throws the
officer another apple. "here, try this one." This time the
officer says that it tastes like a peach. The inventor
eagerly asks him to turn it around and take a bite out of the
other side. The officer does so and is rewarded with the
taste of bananna.
"This is a great invention. "it's
too bad that you can't make
one that tastes like Pussy!" The inventor smiles and reaches
into his pocket, producing another apple. "Try it," he says.
The officer takes a bite and his face contorts horribly. "That
tastes like shit!" he yells.
"Turn it around," laughs the inventor.
There's this inventor who was
experimenting with making an
apple that tastes like something else. So, he makes an
apple that tastes like a Candy bar. He asks his brother
to try it. His brother goes, "whooah! This tastes exactly
like a candy bar, but I don't think people will buy it,
they'll just buy a candy bar instead. So the next day he
makes an apple that tastes like a steak. He gives it to
his brother. "This tastes exactly like a steak but I don't
think people will go for it, they'll just buy a steak
instead," his brother replied. So the next day he makes an
apple that tastes like a women. His brother tries it and
says, "This is gross, it tastes like shit!" The inventor
says "Oh yeah, turn it around!"
Bud Light Institute (S578d)
From: sfo_pilot on 2/11/2008
This Bud Light commercial explains
who invented many of
America's activities for women. Click 'HERE' to see it.
Subj: Two Amazing Website Patents (S277)
From: jerry on 5/19/2002
Wouldn't it be really stupid
if the U.S Patent and Trademark
office awarded someone a patent which says that using text
and graphics on a commercial website is a new and unique use
and that any company that has text and graphics on their
website should now pay a licensing fee? And wouldn't it be
just as stupid if they awarded a patent to someone which
says that using a website to conduct business is a new use
and that websites should now start paying licensing fees to
I've got bad news for my fellow
Americans. Your government
is this stupid.
The U.S. Patent and Trademark
office has awarded patents
5,576,951 and 6,289,319 to PanIP Corporation giving them
these exclusive rights. And PanIP has not wasted any time
filing lawsuits against 11 small companies to set a
precedent from which to launch other suits. PanIP wants
$30,000 from each site, something considered by these sites
to be extortion.
According to DICKSON SUPPLY CO
com), one of the unfortunate companies named in the suit,
a protracted patent battle would cost them about $1 million
so from a business perspective it would be cheaper to pay
the $30,000. But PanIP picked the wrong company. Dickerson
feels they have an obligation to society to bury these
patents and will fight PanIP in court. They are trying to
pool legal resources with the other 10 named companies in
Are you fed up with this stuff?
Spread the word and if
you are an American, contact your government representatives.
PanIP pulled their website, probably
to avoid hearing from
You can get more information
about the lawsuits from
Subj: Short Patent And Copyright Jokes
Useless Box With Surprises (S860d)
By Jeffrey Kohler
Photo from YouTube.com...
From: Joke-Of-The-Day on 9/27/2001
Most of the important things in the world have been
accomplished by people sho have kept on trying when
there seemed to be no hope at all. -- Dale Carnegie
Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors.
The city of San Francisco holds a copyright on the name “San
Francisco.” It is illegal to manufacture any item with the
name without first getting permission from the city. Since
the Supreme Court upheld the copyright, San Francisco has
had an annual $300 million surplus every year.
From: TAdams on 1/24/2001 (S208)
There is no limit to what a man can do or where he can go,
if he doesn't mind who gets the credit.
-- Ronald R. Reagan
From: LABLaughs.com on 6/27/2002 (S282b)
Everything that can be invented has been invented.
-- Charles H. Duell, Commissioner,
U.S. Office of Patents, 1899
From: LABLaughs.com on 1/10/2003 (S310b)
If you have a rupee and I have another, and we exchange, we
have one rupee each; if you have a better idea and I Have
another, and we exchange, we have two better ideas each.
From: LABLaughs.com on 7/29/2003 (S340b)
The more devices we invent for dominating nature,
the more we must serve them if we are to survive.
-- The Revolt of Nature
From: LABLaughs.com on 10/3/2003 (S349b)
It's relatively simple. If we're not getting more, better
faster than they are getting more, better faster, than
we're getting less better or more worse. -- Tom Peters
From: Joke-Of-The-Day-Mail.com on 3/20/2007
You can't solve a problem with the same kind of thinking
that created it.