.
 
>>>
Subj:     Strange Laws
                 (Includes 161 jokes and articles, 21 1006n,7,cf,vXT2b,3)

Scales of Justice
from
Best Animations
.
Includes the following:  Can You Recite The Ten Commandments? - Comic Strip (DU)
.........................Top 10 U.S. Sex Laws - List (S772)
.........................International Sex Laws (S140)
.........................Strange Sex Laws (S58)
.........................The 48 Laws of Power - Video/List (S775)
.........................The Asshole Bill of Rights (S594b)
.........................New California Laws Effective 7/1/07 (S546c)
.........................The Limbaugh Laws - Video (S485c)
.........................Murphy's Law of Technology And The Internet (S437, DU)
.........................Murphy's Laws and Others (S234)
.........................Law Of Mechanical Repair - Photo (S983)
.........................Murphy's Laws of Work (S317, S677)
.........................Variations On Murphy's Law (S158, DU)
.........................Addemdum To Murphy's Law (S251, S618c)
.........................Not A Jumper - Cartoon (S439)
.........................Crazy Laws (S59)
.........................More Crazy Laws (S193)
.........................Short Law Jokes
..............................Mallard Fillmore On Light Bulbs (S600b)

Also see BIRDS-DUCKS  - 'The Laws Of Ducks'
         CARSMURPHY   - 'Murphy's Laws Applied To Cars'
         CARTOON file - 'Cartoon Laws of Physics'
         COMP-SUPP    - 'Murphy's Laws Of Computing'
         INDIAN file  - 'The Dead Horse Theory' - Drawing
         LAWYER1 file - 'The Lawyer Wins One......'
         MOTHERS-SUPP - 'Murphy's Law For Moms'
         MOVIES2-SUPP - 'NCIS - Gibbs Rules' - Video
         POLITICAL2   - 'Non Sequitur Cartoon'
         SCIENCE1 file- 'Laws In Science, Engineering, And Life'
......................- 'Finagle's Laws, Creed, and Motto'
......................- 'Clarke's Laws'
......................- 'Murphy's Laws Of Research'
         SEX2 LAWS    - 'Sex Laws'
         SOLDIER-SUPP - 'Murphy's Military Laws...'

============================================================Top
Subj:     Can You Recite The Ten Commandments? (DU)
          Cartoonest David Horsey
 Source: http://www.decrepitoldfool.com/images/
.........01/know10commandments-partial.gif
.
...........
.
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Top
Subj:     Top 10 U.S. Sex Laws (S772)
          From: LeeAnna Williams on Facebook on 10/29/11
..........Source: Interesting Things For you Late @ Night
Drawing from SexLaws.org

 (Also see 'SEX Laws' below)

 Click 'HERE' to see the Top 10 U.S. Sex Laws.

Top
Subj:     International Sex Laws (S140)
          From: FrankRoesc on 10/03/1999

 Rules, rules, rules always something to control your behavior?
 Well, check these out.  And you guys thought we had it bad here.

 Most Middle Eastern countries recognize the following Islamic
 law:  After having sexual relations with a lamb, it is a mortal
 sin to eat its flesh."  (umm ok, I'm sure the lamb appreciates
 that one)

 In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals,
 but the animals must be female.  Having sexual relations with a
 male animal is punishable by death.  (OK, like THAT makes sense)

 In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman's genitals,
 but is forbidden from looking directly at them during the exam-
 ination.  He may only see their reflection in a mirror.

 Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse.  This
 also applies to undertakers; the sex organs of the deceased must
 be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times.  (...a
 brick?????)

 The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation.
 (wonder how they enforce that one??)

 There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the
 countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the
 privilege of having sex for the first time.  Reason: under Guam
 law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry.  (now let's
 just think for a minute...is there any job anywhere else in the
 world that even comes close to this?)

 In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her
 adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands.  (the
 husband's lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner
 desired).

 Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England - but only in
 tropical fish stores.  (of course!!)

 In Cali, Colombia, a woman may only have sex with her husband,
 and the first time this happens her mother must be in the room to
 witness the act.  (shudder at the thought)

 In Santa Cruz, Bolivia it is illegal for a man to have sex with a
 woman and her daughter at the same time.  (...we have to presume
 this was abig enough problem that they had to pass this law...?)

 In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines
 with one exception: prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending
 machine in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consump-
 tion on the premises."  (Is this a great country or what?)

Top
Subj:     Strange Sex Laws (S58)
          From: RFSlick on 98-03-10

 (Also see 'Top 10 U.S. Sex Laws' above)

 In Ventura County, California, cats and dogs are not allowed
 to have sex without a permit.

 If a police officer in Coeur d'Alene, Idaho, suspects a
 couple is having sex inside a vehicle they must honk their
 horn three times, and wait two minutes before being allowed
 to approach the scene.

 A law in Oblong, Illinois makes it a crime to make love
 while fishing or hunting on your wedding day.

 In Ames Iowa a husband may not take more than three gulps
 of beer while lying in bed with his wife, or holding you
 in his arms.

 A law in Alexandria, Minnesota makes it illegal for a
 husband to make love to his wife if his breath smells like
 garlic, onions, or sardines.

 A Helena, Montana law states that a woman cannot dance on
 a saloon table unless her clothing weights more than three
 pounds, two ounces.

 Hotel owners in Hastings, Nebraska are required by law to
 provide a clean, white cotton nightshirt to each guest.
 According to the law, no couple may have sex unless they
 are wearing the nightshirts.

 Any couple making out inside a vehicle, and accidentally
 sounding the horn during their lustful act, may be taken
 to jail according to a Liberty Corner, New Jersey law.

 During lunch breaks in Carlsbad, New Mexico, no couple
 should engage in a sexual act while parked in their vehicle,
 unless their car has curtains.

 In Nevada sex without a condom is considered illegal.

 In Harrisburg, Pennsylvania it is illegal to have sex with
 a truck driver inside a toll booth.

 Hotels in Sioux Falls, South Dakota, are required by law to
 furnish their rooms with twin beds only.  There should be a
 minimum of two feet between the beds, and it is illegal for
 a couple to make love on the floor between the beds.

 In Kingsville, Texas, there is a law against two pigs having
 sex on the city's airport property.

 A Tremonton, Utah law states that no woman is allowed to have
 sex with a man while riding in an ambulance.  In addition to
 normal charges, the woman's name will be published in the
 local newspaper.  The man does not receive any punishment.

 In the state of Washington there is a law against having sex
 with a virgin under any circumstances. (including the wedding
 night)

 In Connorsville, Wisconsin no man shall shoot of a gun while
 his female partner is having a sexual orgasm.

 The only acceptable sexual position in Washington D.C. is the
 missionary-style position. Any other sexual position is
 considered illegal. (So this is how they plan on getting Clinton)

From: Ossama's Laugh on 1/31/98

 Bozeman, Montana, has a law that bans all sexual activity
 between members of the opposite sex in the front yard of a
 home after sundown -- if they're nude. (Apparently, if you
 wear socks, you're safe from the law!)

 In Cleveland, Ohio women are not allowed to wear patent-
 leather shoes.

 Clinton, Oklahoma has a law against masturbating while
 watching two people having sex in a car.

 In Detroit, couples are not allowed to make love in an
 automobile unless the act takes place while the vehicle
 is parked on the couple's own property.

 A law in Fairbanks, Alaska does not allow moose to have
 sex on city streets.

 A state law in Illinois mandates that all bachelors should
 be called master, not mister, when addressed by their
 female counterparts.

 An excerpt form brilliant Kentucky state legislation. "No
 female shall appear in a bathing suit on any highway within
 this state unless she be escorted by at least two officers
 or unless she be armed with a club".

 The following important ammendment however is to be
 considered here: "The provisions of this statuate shall not
 apply to females weighing less than 90 pounds nor exceeding
 200 pounds, nor shall it apply to female horses."

 In Merryville, Missouri, women are prohibited from wearing
 corsets because "The privilege of admiring the curvaceous,
 unencumbered body of a young woman should not be denied to
 the normal, red-blooded American male."

 In Michigan, a woman isn't allowed to cut her own hair
 without her husband's permission.

 An ordinance in Newcastle, Wyoming, specifically bans
 couples from having sex while standing inside a store's
 walk-in meat freezer!

 In Norfolk, Virginia, a woman can't go out without wearing
 a corset. (There was a civil-service job -- for men only
 -- called a corset inspector.)

 In Oxford, Ohio, it's illegal for a woman to strip off her
 clothing while standing in front of a man's picture.

 Utah state legislation outlaws all sex with anyone but your
 spouse.  Next to that adultery, oral and anal sex, mastur-
 bation are considered sodomy and can lead to imprisonment.
 Sex with an animal - unless performed for profit - however
 is NOT considered sodomy. Polygamy - provided only the
 missionary position has been applied - is only a misdemeanor.

 In Willowdale, Oregon no man may curse while having sex
 with his wife.

Top
Subj:     The 48 Laws of Power (S775d)
          Written by Robert Greene
          From: philsam on 11/20/2011
Photo from Amazon.com
 Source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_48_Laws_of_Power

 The 48 Laws of Power is a 1998 book by Robert Greene.
 Greene takes elements of some of the worlds greatest
 political thinkers of our time to come up with the 48
 Laws of Power, from Niccol? Machiavelli to Sun Tsu, he
 captures their most important points of power.  The
 book was immediately successful, selling more than 1
 million copies in the US, as were his follow-up works,
 The Art of Seduction and The 33 Strategies of War.

 Unlike most self-help books, "The 48 Laws" offers advice
 that the author freely admits is, at times, cunning and
 amoral.  It includes lessons like "Law 1: Never outshine
 the master" and "Law 14: Pose as a friend, work as a spy."

 The lessons are distilled from colorful anecdotes lifted
 from 4,000 years of history.  They include insights into
 the scheming of powerful people such as Al Capone, P.T.
 Barnum and Henry Kissinger.

 Click 'HERE' to read Greene's list of 48 Laws of Power.
.
Also on this web page is a video of Robert Greene's
insights from his book The 50th Law.  In this book,
Photo from AllVoices.com
 Greene talks about whether anyone can learn to be fearless.
 He gives an example of working together with the rapper 50
 Cents.

Top
Subj:     The Asshole Bill of Rights (S594b)
          From: LABLaughsAdult on 5/27/2008

 The Asshole Bill of Rights As an ASSHOLE,
 I proclaim the following:

 #1 I will live my life the way I deem fit, screw political
 correctness.

 #2 I have the right to choose my religious path if I
 choose one at = all. Christianity be damned.

 #3 If I want to eat a cow, I will eat a cow.

 #4 I have the right to hang up on telemarketers
 midsentence and not have to worry about whether
 or not I was polite.

 #5 If I think someone's an idiot, I will tell them
 they're an idiot.

 #6 I have the right to tell children that their parents
 aren't raising them correctly. (Think of how many times
 you've been at a supermarket and heard a screaming child
 the entire time...what exactly would you want to say
 that'd be any nicer?)

 #7 If you don't know what you're talking about, shut the
 hell up.

 #8 You may have the right to speak, but I don't have to
 listen to you.

 #9 If I want to be rude, loud, and obnoxious, it's a
 free country.

 #10 If I want to go to a bar, destroy my liver with
 alcohol, clog my arteries with junk , and have unsafe
 sex with the woman/man I just met, I ought to be able
 to smoke while I'm at it.

 #11 I may be fat, but you're ugly, and I can go to
 Jenny Craig.

 #12 Jerry Springer for President!!!!!!!

 #13 Denis Leary should be proclaimed God and given
 reign over society.

 #14 Your daughter just got drunk at a party, made a
 slut of herself, and you're worried about my
 religious beliefs?

 #15 Before you tell me how to run my life, be
 certain that your own is squeaky clean.

 #16 Just because you work at McDonald's doesn't
 mean you have an excuse to have an I.Q. under
 twelve.

 #17 (Courtesy of George Carlin) Just because you're a
 student does not mean that you're any more enlightened
 than someone that works at Blockbuster.

 #18 Speaking of Blockbuster, if I return the tape, you do
 not have to actually sue me for $15!!

 #19 If you're stupid enough to give me credit, deal with
 the consequences.

 #20 It's ignorant to charge someone $25 if they bounce a
 check for $5. (If I didn't have the $5, what makes you
 think I'm going to have $25 you retards!!)

 #21 If you don't like the way I drive then at the next red
 light get out from under my car.

 #22 If your dog or cat is so smart, then why do you talk
 to it like it's a newborn baby?

 #23 If I shoot you while you're committing a crime, and
 you try to sue me for it, I'll shoot you again.

 #24 Courtesy of Ben Franklin: Anyone who would give up
 freedoms and liberties for temporary security deserves
 neither freedom or security.

 #25 If you live in Tornado Alley, don't whine when you get
 hit by a tornado.

Top
Subj:     New California Laws effective 7/1/07 (S546c)
          From: edapsmas on 6/25/2007

 New Driving Fines for 2007

 1. Carpool lane - 1st time $1068.50 starting  7/1/07 (The
 $271 posted on the highway is old).  Don't do it again
 because 2nd time is going to be double.  3rd time triple,
 and 4th time license suspended.

 2. Incorrect lane change - $380. Don't cross the lane on
 solid lines or intersections.

 3. Block intersection - $485

 4. Driving on the shoulder - $450

 5. Cell phone use in the construction zone. - Double fine
 as of 07/01/07.  Cell phone use must be "hands free" while
 driving.

 6. Passengers over 18 not in their seatbelts - both
 passengers and drivers get tickets .

 7. Speeders can only drive 3 miles above the limit.

 8. DUI = JAIL (Stays on your driving record for 10 years!)

 9. As of 07/01/07 cell phone use must be "hands free"
 while driving.  Ticket is $285.  They will be looking for
 this like crazy - easy money for police department.

 These traffic laws are just another Urban Legend.  Thank you
 Chris for catching my error.  You can read Snopes.com's
 report on this false email at the following address:
 http://www.snopes.com/politics/traffic/california.asp

Top
Subj:     The Limbaugh Laws (S485c,d in Mexican)
          From: darrell94590 on 5/8/2006
 Source: http://www.youtube.com/embed/N2JrjBRz940

 You can see this video of Rush Limbaugh's opinions
 about imigration by clicking 'HERE'.

Top
Subj:     Murphy's Law of Technology And The Internet (S437, Du)
          From: Joke-Of-The-Day-Mail.com on 6/14/2005

 Murphy's Technology Law #1 -- You can never tell which way the
     train went by looking at the track.

 Murphy's Technology Law #2 -- Logic is a systematic method of
     coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence.

 Murphy's Technology Law #3 -- Technology is dominated by those
     who manage what they do not understand.

 Murphy's Technology Law #4 -- If builders built buildings the
     way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker
     that came along would destroy civilization.

 Murphy's Technology Law #5 -- All great discoveries are made
     by mistake.

 Murphy's Technology Law #6 -- Nothing ever gets built on
     schedule or within budget.

 Murphy's Technology Law #7 -- All's well that ends... period.

 Murphy's Technology Law #8 -- A meeting is an event at which
     minutes are kept and hours are lost.

 Murphy's Technology Law #9 -- The first myth of management is
     that it exists.

 Murphy's Technology Law #10 -- A failure will not appear
     until a unit has passed final inspection.

 Murphy's Technology Law #11 -- New systems generate new
     problems.

 Murphy's Technology Law #12 -- Any given program, when
     running, is obsolete.

 Murphy's Technology Law #13 -- A computer makes as many
     mistakes in two seconds as 20 men working 20 years make.

Top
Subj:     Murphy's Laws and Others (S234)
          From: pns on 7/23/2001

 Murphy's Laws and Other Observations

 Murphy's Laws

 Murphy's First Law: Nothing is as easy as it looks.
 Murphy's Second Law: Everything takes longer than you think.
 Murphy's Third Law: Whatever can go wrong, will go wrong.
 Murphy's Fourth Law: If there is a possibility of several
          things going wrong, the one that will cause the
          most damage will be the one to go wrong.
 Murphy's Fifth Law: If anything just cannot go wrong,
          it will anyway.
 Murphy's Sixth Law: If you perceive that there are four
          possible ways in which a procedure can go wrong
          and circumvent these, then a fifth way, unprepared
          for, will promptly develop.
 Murphy's Seventh Law: Left to themselves, things tend to go
          from bad to worse.
 Farnsdick's corollary: After things have gone from bad to
          worse, the cycle will repeat itself.
 Murphy's Eight Law: If everything seems to be going well,
          you have obviously overlooked something.
 Murphy's Ninth Law: Nature always sides with the hidden flaw.
 Murphy's Tenth Law: Mother Nature is a witch.
 Murphy's Eleventh Law: It is impossible to make anything
          foolproof, because fools are so ingenious.

 O'tooles Commentary On Murphy's Laws
    Murphy was an optimist.

 Ginsberg's Theorems
    1. You can't win.
    2. You can't even break even.
    3. You can't even quit the game.

 Forsyth's Second Corollary to Murphy's Laws
   Just when you see the light at the end of the tunnel,
   the roof caves in.

 Weilers Law
   Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have
   to do it himself.


    The Laws of Computer Programming

 1. Any give program, when running, is obsolete.
 2. Any given program costs more and takes longer
    each time it is run.
 3. If a program is useful, it will have to be changed.
 4. If a program is useless, it will have to be documented.
 5. Any given program will expand to fill all
    the available memory.
 6. The value of a program is inversely proportional to
    the weight of its output.
 7. Program complexity grows until it exceeds the capability
    of the programmer who must maintain it.

Top
Subj:     Law Of Mechanical Repair (S983)
          From: Todd Anderson on Facebook on 10/26/2015
 Source: http://www.cafepress.com/+law_of_mech
.........anical_repair_tile_coaster,195118439
.
...........
.
.....Click on the source to buy this TILE COASTER for $10.99.
.
.
Top
Subj:     Murphy's Laws of Work (S317, S677)
          From: JBCARY1 on 2/27/2003

  1. To err is human, to forgive is not company policy.
  2. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced,
     you can't be promoted.
  3. The more crap you put up with,
     the more crap you are going to get.
  4. A pat on the back is only a few centimeters
     from a kick in the pants.
  5. Eat one live toad the first thing in the morning and
     nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.
  6. Never ask two questions in a business letter.  The
     reply will discuss the one you are least interested
     in and say nothing about the other.
  7. When the bosses talk about improving productivity,
     they are never talking about themselves.
  8. If at first you don't succeed, try again.  Then quit.
     No use being a darn fool about it.
  9. There will always be beer cans rolling on the floor
     of your car when the boss asks for a ride home from
     the office.
 10. Mother said there would be days like this,
     but she never said there would be so many.
 11. Keep your boss's boss off your boss's back.
 12. Everything can be filed under "miscellaneous."
 13. Never delay the ending of a meeting or the
     beginning of a cocktail hour.
 14. You can go anywhere you want if you look serious
     and carry a clipboard.
 15. Anyone can do any amount of work provided it
     isn't the work he is supposed to be doing.
 16. Important letters that contain no errors will
     develop errors in the mail.
 17. The last person that quit or was fired will be the
     one held responsible for everything that goes wrong.
 18. There is never enough time to do it right the first
     time, but there is always enough time to do it over.
 19. The more pretentious a corporate name, the smaller
     the organization. (For instance, The Murphy Center
     for Codification of Human and Organizational Law,
     contrasted to IBM, GM, AT?T...).
 20. If you are good, you will be assigned all the work.
     If you are really good, you will get out of it.

Top
Subj:     Variations On Murphy's Law (S158, DU)
          From: icohen on 02/07/2000

  1. The Law of Common Sense
     Never accept a drink from a urologist.

  2. The Law of Reality
     Never get into fights with ugly people, they have
     nothing to lose.

  3. The Law of Self Sacrifice
     When you starve with a tiger, the tiger starves last.

  4. The Law of Volunteering
     If you dance with a grizzly bear, you had better
     let him lead.

  5. The Law of Avoiding Oversell
     When putting cheese in a mousetrap, always leave
     room for the mouse.

  6. The Law of Motivation
     Creativity is great, but plagiarism is faster.

  7. Boob's Law
     You always find something in the last place you look.

  8. Wailer's Law
     Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have
     to do it himself.

  9. Law of Probable Dispersal
     Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.

 10. Law of Volunteer Labor
     People are always available for work in the past tense.

 11. Conway's Law
     In any organization there is one person who knows what
     is going on.  That person must be fired.

 12. Iron Law of Distribution
     Them that has, gets.

 13. Law of Cybernetic Entomology
     There is always one more bug.

 14. Law of Drunkenness
     You can't fall off the floor.

 15. Heeler's Law
     The first myth of management is that it exists.

 16. Osborne's Law
     Variables won't; constants aren't.

 17. Main's Law
     For every action there is an equal and opposite
     government program.

 18. Weinberg's Second Law
     If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote
     programs, then  the first woodpecker that came along
     would have destroyed civilization.

Top
Subj:     Addemdum To Murphy's Law (S251, S618c)
          From: TNKRTEACH on 97-04-09
      and From: darrellvip on 11/10/2008

  1. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't
     have film.

  2. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

  3. A day without sunshine is like, well, night.

  4. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

  5. Back up my hard drive? How do I put it in reverse?

  6. I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.

  7. When the chips are down, the buffalo is empty.

  8. Seen it all, done it all. Can't remember most of it.

  9. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.

 10. I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.

 11. He's not dead, he's electroencephalographically challenged.

 12. She's always late. Her ancestors arrived on the Juneflower.

 13. You have the right to remain silent.  Anything you
     say will be misquoted, then used against you.

 14. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without
     sponges.

 15. Honk if you love peace and quiet.

 16. Pardon my driving, I'm reloading.

 17. Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how
     it remains so popular?

 18. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

 19. It is hard to understand how a cemetery raised its
     burial costs and blamed it on the high cost of living.

 20. Just remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all
     fall off.

 21. The 50-50-90 rule:  Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of
     getting something right, there's a 90% probability
     you'll get it wrong.

 22. It is said that if you line up all the cars in the
     world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to
     try and pass them.

 23. You can't have everything. Where would you put it?

 24. Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75%
     of the world's population.

 25. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

 26. The things that come to those that wait may be the
     things left by those who got there first.

 27. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach
     a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day
     drinking beer.

 28. Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries.

 29. Shin: A device for finding furniture.

 30. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine
     for doing well.

 31. It was recently discovered that research causes
     cancer in rats.

 32. Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter since nobody
     listens.

 33. I wish the buck stopped here, as I could use a few.

 34. I started out with nothing, and I still have most
     of it.

 35. When you go into court, you are putting yourself
     in the hands of 12 people that weren't smart enough
     to get out of jury duty.

 36. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some
     people appear bright until you hear them speak.

 37. Great earth changes have been predicted for the future.
     So if you're looking to avoid earthquakes, my advice is
     simple.  When you find a fault, don't dwell on it.

Top
Subj:     Not A Jumper (S439)
          By Dan Piraro on 6/21/2005
 Source: http://bizarro.com/
.
.................
.
.
Top
Subj:     Crazy Laws (S59)
          From: Ossama's Laugh on 1/5/98

 Texas

 A recently passed antcrime law requires criminals to give
 their victims 24 hours notice, either orally or in writing,
 and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed...

 In Lefors, it is illegal to take more than three swallows
 of beer at any time while standing...

 In San Antonio, it is illegal for both sexes to flirt or
 respond to flirtation using the eyes and/or hands....
 

 Florida

 It is illegal for single, divorced, or widowed women to
 parachute on Sunday afternoons.

 In Saratoga, it is illegal to sing while wearing a
 bathing suit...
 

 Nevada

 It is illegal to drive a camel on the highway...

 In Eureka, men who wear moustaches are forbidden from
 kissing women...
 

 California

 In L.A. a man can legally beat his wife with a leather strap,
 as long as it is less than two inches wide, or she gives him
 permission to use a wider strap.....

 It is illegal to set a mousetrap without a hunting license....
 

 Michigan

 A state law stipulates that a woman's hair legally belongs
 to her husband....
 

 Arkansas

 A man can legally beat his wife, but not more than
 once a month...

 Flirtation between the members of the opposite sex on the
 streets of Little Rock may result in a 30 day jail term....
 

 Utah

 Birds have the right of way on all highways...

 A husband is responsible for every criminal act commited by
 his wife while she is in his presence...
 

 Baltimore

 In Halethrope, it is illegal to kiss for more than one second...

 It is illegal to mistreat oysters....

 In Baltimore it is illegal to wash or scrub sinks, no matter
 how dirty they get....
 

 New York

 In NYC it is illegal for a man to turn around and look "at
 a woman in that way", and violators are forced to wear horse
 blinders...
 

 Tennessee

 It is illegal to use a lasso to catch a fish...

 In Dyersburg, it is illegal for a woman to call a man for a date...

 In Memphis, it is illegal for a woman to drive by herself;
 "a man must walk or run in front of the vehicle, waving a red
 flag in order to warn approaching pedestrians and motorists"....
 

 Colorado

 In Logan County, it is illegal for a man to kiss a woman while
 she is asleep....
 

 Rhode Island

 In Province it is illegal to sell toothpaste ands toothbrush
 to the same customer on a Sunday....

 In Neewport, it is illegal to smoke a pipe after sunset....
 

 Oklahoma

 Whale hunting is strictly forbidden throughout the entire state...

 In Tulsa, kisses lasing more than three minutes are forbidden...
 

 Massachusetts

 In Salem, even married couples are forbidden from sleeping
 in the nude in rented rooms...

 In Boston it is illegal to take a bath unless one has been
 ordered by a physician to do so....

 In 1659, the State outlawed Christmas...

Top
Subj:     More Crazy Laws (S193)
          From: JOKE-OF-THE-DAY.com on 10/1/00

 In Temperance, MS, you can't walk a dog without dressing
 it in diapers.

 In St. Louis, a law on the books makes it illegal to park
 your car without turning off the engine.  This was to
 avoid scaring horses.

 In Kansas City, KS, saying the name "George Washington"
 without adding the phrase "blessed be his name," can land
 you with a fine of up to fifty cents.

 In California, selling a gold piece without tooth marks in
 it is considered forgery.

 An old statute in Flint, MI, compels dentists to offer a
 "slug of whiskey with no additional charge to said patient."

 In Manchester, England, an ancient law declares that if a
 young man develops a lisp, he must be inspected by a bishop
 to ensure that he isn't developing homosexual tendencies.

 The city of San Francisco holds a copyright on the name "San
 Francisco." It is illegal to manufacture any item with the
 name without first getting permission from the city.  Since
 the Supreme Court upheld the copyright, San Francisco has
 had an annual $300 million surplus every year.

 In Raleigh, North Carolina, before a man asks for a woman's
 hand in marriage, he must be "inspected by all the barnyard
 animals on the young woman's family's property, to ensure a
 harmonious farm life."

 Slavery is still legal in Decatur, Alabama.

 In Salzburg, Germany, any child born on August 18th must be
 tested for possible witchcraft.  This is due to a local legend
 that an evil warlock was born on that day in 1638.


Subj:     Short Law Jokes

Top
Subj:     Mallard Fillmore On Light Bulbs (S600b)
          By Bruce Tinsley on 7/11/2008
 Source: http://comicskingdom.com/mallard-fillmore
 You can read the Mallard Fillmore comic strips on the new
 fluorescent light bulb law by clicking 'HERE'.
 

 One of the reasons marijuana is illegal today because cotton
 growers in the 30s lobbied against hemp farmers -- they saw
 it as competition.  It is not chemically addictive as is
 nicotine, alcohol, or caffeine.

From: Joke-of-the-Day.com on 1/5/2007 (S519b)
 "Tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe and
  he'll believe you.  Tell him a bench has wet paint on it
  and he'll have to touch it to be sure."  -- Murphy's Law

From: Joke-of-the-Day.com on 1/25/2007 (S523b)
 "Laws are like sausages.  It's better not to see them
  being made."  -- Otto von Bismarck

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