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Subj:  You Know You're From... 
            (Includes 28 jokes and articles, 19 1005,14,cf,wYT2b3b,6)

       Click "Here" for
       You Know You're From-Supp


San Francisco from
Millanimations
Includes the following:  Napa's Old Man Rock - Story And Photo (S899 in Supp)
.........................Do You Speak Pittsburghese? - Video (S1005 in Supp)
.........................Mickey And Minnie Mouse In San Francisco - Video (S922-Sup)
.........................Places I Have Been (S814 in Supp)
.........................How Hawaiian's Stand in line... - Photo (S957 in Supp)
.........................San Francisco In 1955 - 21 Min. Movie (S781 in Supp)
.........................Survivor, Texas Style (S799 in Supp)
.........................SlotZilla Zipline In Las Vegas - Video (S980 in Supp)
.........................Bon Jovi Sings 'She Don't Know Me' In Benicia-Vid(S702b-Sp)
.........................Texas Vs California (S732 in Supp)
.........................Skeet Shootin' - Texas Style - Video (S687 in Supp)
.........................Ripley's Believe It Or Not! (S700 in Supp)
.........................San Francisco 1940 - 9 Min. Movie (S684b in Supp)
.........................You Know You're From The Bay Area When... (S10 in Supp)
.........................BHS Band In St. Patrick's Day Parade - 3 Videos (S790-Supp)
.........................White Pages Neighbors (S805 in Supp)
.........................You Know You're A Native Noo Awleanian If: (DU in Supp)
.........................Michael Jackson - Cry - Music Video (S979)
.........................San Francisco In 1943 - 5 Min. Movie (S985)
.........................
.........................San Francisco in 1905 - Video (S672b)
.........................Atlanta, GA (S400c)
.........................Frank And Ernest Cartoon (S749)
.........................You know You are from Georgia When ... Part I (S494b)
.........................Texas Shopping - Video (S681b)
.........................You Know You're From Phoenix, Arizona If... (S300b)
.........................Multnomah Falls, Or. - Video (S992)
.........................Is It Time To Evaluate Our Involvement? (S384)
.........................You Know You're A Coloranan If... (S354b)
.........................New California Language (S352)
.........................You Know You're From Missouri If... (S300b)
.........................Wireless Parking In San Francisco - Video (S682b)
.........................Where Do You Live? (S297b, S662b)
.........................I'm From Kentucky - Sign (S993)
.........................Moved To Silicon Valley (S239b)
.........................Ripley's Believe It Or Not! (S672)
.........................You Know You're From California When... (S193, S540c)
.........................Crossing Streets In California - Cartoon (S545b)
.........................You Know You Live In SF When... (S44)
.........................Ode To Mare Island Naval Shipyard (S971)
.........................Short California Facts
..............................Tannery Building In Benicia (S921 in Supp)
..............................You Know Your Hot When.... (S851 in Supp)
..............................Old San Francisco (S777 in Supp)
..............................Benicia Girl - Poster (S1005 in Supp)
..............................Benicia High Sports Recap For 2011-2012 (S803 in Supp)
..............................Benicia Sunset (S890 in Supp)
..............................1st Street In Benicia (S892 in Supp)
..............................Benicia Hills (S896 in Supp)
..............................Benicia Sunset Photo II (S897 in Supp)
..............................San Francisco Made w/Toothpicks - Video (S746 in Supp)
..............................Minnesota Death Star - Video (S731 in Supp)
..............................How Well Do You Know San Francisco - Quiz (S916 -Supp)
..............................You Think You Know Vallejo? (S695 in Supp)
..............................How Hot Is It In Texas (S761 in Supp)
..............................20 Things Only Minnesotans Understand (S898 in Supp)
..............................
..............................How To Pronounce Oklahoma (S610c)
..............................Back In 1850 (S447b, S637c)
..............................Bawstin (S573c)
..............................California's New State Seal (S358)

Also see CARS-SUPP2   - 'Gymkhana FIVE: Urban Playground; San Francisco' - Video
         COMPUTERS4   - 'Signs That You Are In The 21st Century'
         COW_SHEEP    - 'You Have Two Cows Vers. II'
         COWBOY file  - 'It's So Hot In Texas That...'
         DOONSBURY    -  (many Arnold pictures)
         FACTS5 file  - 'Rolling Blackout Exemptions'
         FARMER1 file - 'You Might Be a Farmer If...'
         GAYS file    - 'Gay Marriage'
         HEAVEN2 file - 'I Dreamed I Went To Heaven-Poem'
         ITALIAN file - 'You Know Your Italian When...'
         NATIONAL file- 'Only In America'
         NATIONAL2    - 'You Know You Work For The Government If...'
         NATIONAL-SUPP- 'Landmark Quiz'
         NEW_YORK file- 'You Know You're From The Bronx (Da Bronx) If'
         OTHER_NATIONS- '360 Degree Photo of Cape Town' - Interactive SWF
         POLICE-SUPP2 - 'Big Baby In Vallejo' - Newspaper article
         POLIT-SUPP2  - 'You Might Be A Wall Street Occupier, If:'
         STORIES_SUPP - 'Steve Gibbs "When We Were Kids"'
         THO-TIME     - 'Beany's Drive Thru In 1953' - Video
         TRAIN file   - 'Rail Road Crossing In North Dakota'

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Subj:     San Francisco in 1905 (S672b,d)
          From: Wimp.com on 11/14/2009
 Source: (Removed from wimp.com)
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 This seven minute video clip of a cable car ride in 1905 down
 Market Street in San Francisco is amazing and scary. Click
 'HERE', to take this wonderful cable car ride.

Top
Subj:     Atlanta, GA (S400c)
          LABLaughs.com on 8/14/2006

 This is for anyone who lives in Atlanta, Georgia, has ever
 lived in Atlanta, has ever visited Atlanta, ever plans to
 visit Atlanta, knows anyone who already lives in Atlanta,
 or knows anyone who has ever heard of Atlanta.

 Atlanta is composed mostly of one-way streets.  The only
 way to get out of downtown Atlanta is to turnaround and
 start over when you reach Greenville, South Carolina.

 All directions start with, "Go down Peachtree" and include
 the phrase, "When you see the Waffle House."  Except that
 in Cobb County, where all directions begin with, "Go to
 the Big Chicken."

 Peachtree Street has no beginning and no end and is not to
 be confused with:

  Peachtree Circle
  Peachtree Place
  Peachtree Lane
  Peachtree Road
  Peachtree Parkway
  Peachtree Run
  Peachtree Terrace
  Peachtree Avenue
  Peachtree Commons
  Peachtree Battle
  Peachtree Corners
  New Peachtree
  Old Peachtree
  West Peachtree
  Peachtree-Dunwoody
  Peachtree-Chamblee
  Peachtree Industrial Boulevard

 Atlantans only know their way to work and their way home.
 If you ask anyone for directions, they will always send
 you down Peachtree.

 Atlanta is the home of Coca-Cola. Coke's all they drink
 there, so don't ask for any other soft drink unless it's
 made by Coca-Cola.

 The gates at Atlanta's Hartsfield International Airport
 are about 32 miles away from the Main Concourse, so wear
 sneakers and pack a lunch.

 The 8am rush hour is from 6:30 to 10:30 AM.
 The 5pm rush hour is from 3:00 to 7:30 PM.
 Friday's rush hour starts Thursday afternoon
 and lasts through 2am Saturday.

 Only a native can pronounce Ponce De Leon Avenue, so do
 not attempt the Spanish pronunciation.  People will
 simply tilt their heads to the right and stare at you.
 The Atlanta pronunciation is "pawntz duh LEE-awn."

 And yes, they have a street named simply, "Boulevard."

 The falling of one raindrop causes all drivers to immed-
 iately forget all traffic rules.  If a single snowflake
 falls, the city is paralyzed for three days and it's on
 all the channels as a news flash every 15 minutes for a
 week.  Overnight, all grocery stores will be sold out
 of milk, bread, bottled water, toilet paper, and beer.

 I-285, the loop that encircles Atlanta, which has a
 posted speed limit of 55 mph (but you have to maintain
 80 mph just to keep from getting run over), is known to
 truckers as "The Watermelon 500."

 Don't believe the directional markers on highways: I-285
 is marked "East" and West" but you may be going North or
 South.  The locals identify the direction by referring to
 the "Inner Loop" and the "Outer Loop."

 If you travel on Hwy 92 North, you will actually be going
 southeast.

 Never buy a ladder or mattress in Atlanta.  Just go to one
 of the interstates and you will soon find one in the
 middle of the road.

 The last thing you want to do is give another driver the
 finger, unless your car is armored, your trigger finger
 is itchy and your AK-47 has a full clip.

 Possums sleep in the middle of the road with their feet
 in the air. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 live
 in Georgia. There are 10,000 types of spiders.  All 10,000
 live in Georgia, plus a couple no one has seen before.  If
 it grows, it sticks.  If it crawls, it bites.  If you notice
 a vine trying to wrap itself around your leg, you have about
 20 seconds to escape, before you are completely captured and
 covered with Kudzu, another ill-advised "import," like the
 carp, starling, English sparrow, and other "exotic wonders."

 It's not a shopping cart, it's a buggy. "Fixinto" is one
 word (I'm fixinto go to the store).

 Sweet Tea is appropriate for all meals and you start
 drinking it when you're 2 years old.

 "Jeet?" is actually a phrase meaning "Did you eat?"

 "Momma-nem" means: How's Mother and all of the other
 children and other members of the family doing.

 If you understand these, forward them to your friends from
 Atlanta, Georgia and those who just wish they were.

Top
Subj:     Frank And Ernest Cartoon (S749)
          By Bob Thaves on 5/19/2011
 Source: http://www.gocomics.com/frankandernest/2011/05/19
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Subj:     You know You are from Georgia When ... Part I (S494b)
          From: Joke-Of-The-Day-Mail.com on 7/13/2006

  1. You can properly pronounce Chickamauga, DeKalb, Dahlonega,
     Smyrna, Buena Vista, Valdosta, Okefenokee, and La Fayette.
     (P.S. Atlanta = ADD-LANNA not AT-LANT-A.)

  2. You think people who complain about the heat in their
     states are sissies.

  3. A tornado warning siren is your signal to go out in the
     yard and look for a funnel.

  4. You know that the true value of a parking space is not
     determined by the distance to the door, but by the
     availability of shade.

  5. Stores don't have bags or shopping carts, they have sacks
     and buggies.

  6. You've seen people wear bib overalls at weddings and funerals.

  7. You think everyone from a Yankee-state has an accent.

  8. You measure distance in minutes.

  9. You go to the lake because you think it is like going
     to the ocean.

 10. You listen to the weather forecast before picking out
     an outfit.

 11. You know cow pies are not made of beef.

 12. Someone you know has used a football schedule to plan
     their wedding date.

 13. You know someone who has a belt buckle bigger than your fist.

 14. Almost everyone you know is either Baptist or Methodist.

 15. A Mercedes Benz isn't a status symbol.  A Chevy Silverado
     Extended Bed Crew Cab is.

 16. You know everything goes better with Ranch dressing.

Top
Subj:     Texas Shopping (S681b,d)
          From: allenbergman on 1/29/2010
 Source: http://www.youtube.com/embed/wIMiLF_L8s8

 Click 'HERE' to see the silly, cute video "How do you
 know you're shopping in Texas?"

Top
Subj:     You Know You're From Phoenix, Arizona If... (S300b)
          From: LABLaughsClean on 9/9/2005

  1. You are willing to park 3 blocks away because you
     found shade. :-)
  2. You can open and drive your car without touching the
     car door or the steering wheel.
  3. You've experienced condensation on your butt from the
     hot water in the toilet bowl.
  4. You would give anything to be able to splash cold
     water on your face.
  5. You can attend any function wearing shorts and
     a tank top.
  6. "Dress Code" is meaningless at high schools and
     universities. Picture lingerie ads.
  7. You can drive for 4 hours in one direction and
     never leave town.
  8. You have over 100 recipes for Mexican food.
  9. The 4 seasons are: tolerable, hot, really hot, and
     ARE YOU KIDDING ME??!!
 10. You know that "dry heat" is comparable to what hits
     you in the face when you open your oven door.

Top
Subj:     Multnomah Falls, Or. (S992)
          From: Melissa Weers on Facebook on 1/22/2016
 Source: https://www.facebook.com/leonmoore
.........101/videos/10202750609948004/
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.................Click 'HERE' to see this
.................beautiful 23 second video.
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Top
Subj:     Is It Time To Evaluate Our Involvement? (S384)
          From: tadams96 on 6/2/2004

 Every day there are news reports about more deaths.  Every
 night on TV there are photos of death and destruction. Why
 are we still there?

 We occupied this land, which we had to take by force, but
 it causes us nothing but trouble. Why are  we still there?

 Many of our children go there and never come back.  Why
 are we still there?

 Their government is unstable, and they have loopy leadership.
 Why are we still there?

 Many of their people are uncivilized. Why are we still there?

 The place is subject to natural disasters, which we are
 supposed to bail them out of. Why are we still  there?

 There are more than 1000 religious sects, which we do not
 understand.  Why are we still there?

 Their folkways, foods and fads are unfathomable to ordinary
 Americans. Why are we still there?

 We can't even secure the borders. Why are we still there?

 They are billions of dollars in debt and it will cost
 billions more to rebuild, which we can't afford.  Why
 are we still there?

 It is becoming clear.

 WE MUST PULL OUT OF CALIFORNIA!

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Subj:     You Know You're A Coloranan If... (S354b)
          From: Imogenelumen on 11/8/2003
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Top
Subj:     New California Language (S352)
          From: Imogenelumen on 10/28/2003

 The New California Governor has just announced an agreement
 whereby English will be the official language of the state,
 rather than German, which was the other possibility.

 As part of the negotiations, The Terminator's Government
 conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement
 and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become
 known as "Austro-English" (or, perhaps even better,
 "Austrionics".)

 In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c".  Sertainly,
 this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.  The hard
 "c" will be dropped in favour of the "k".  This should klear
 up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

 There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year
 when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with the "f".
 This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

 In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan
 be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes
 are possible.

 Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which
 have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.  Also, al wil
 agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
 disgrasful and it should go away.

 By the 4th yer peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing
 "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".

 During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords
 kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil
 sensibl riten styl.

 Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it
 ezi tu understand ech oza.  Ze drem of a united urop vil
 finali kum tru.

 If zis mad yu smil, pleas pas it on to oza pepl.

Top
Subj:     You Know You're From Missouri If... (S300b)
          From: dmswitzer on 10/27/2002

 I haven't contributed anything to the Sunday Funnies in a
 very very long time, but I thought this might be something
 that would be original enough.  Of course, if you don't
 have other readers in Missouri (or who know people from
 Missouri), the humor may not be apparent!

  1. You've never met any celebrities.
  2. Everyone you know has been on a "Float Trip"
  3. "Vacation" means driving to Silver Dollar City,
     Worlds of Fun or Six Flags.
  4. You've seen all the biggest bands ten years
     AFTER they were popular.
  5. You measure distance in minutes rather than miles.
  6. Down south to you means Arkansas.
  7. The phrase "I'm going to the Lake this weekend"
     only means one thing.
  8. You know several people who have hit a deer.
  9. You think Missouri is spelled with an "ah" at the end.
 10. Your school classes were canceled because of cold.
 11. You know what "Party Cove" is.
 12. Your school classes were canceled because of heat.
 13. You instinctively ask someone you've just met,
     "What High School did you go to?"
 14. You've had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
 15. You think ethanol makes your truck "run a lot better."
 16. You know what's knee-high by the Fourth of July.
 17. You see people wear bib overalls at funerals.
 18. You see a car running in the parking lot at the store
     with no one it, no matter what time of the year.
 19. You know in your heart that Mizzou can beat Nebraska
     in football. (but NEVER Oklahoma!)
 20. You end your sentences with an unnecessary preposition.
     Example: "Where's my coat at?"
 21. All the festivals across the state are named after
     a fruit, vegetable, or grain.
 22. You install security lights on your house and garage
     and leave both unlocked.
 23. You think of the major four food groups as beef,
     potato, beer, and Jell-O salad with marshmallows.
 24. You carry jumper cables in your car and
     know that everyone else should.
 25. You went to skating parties as a kid.
 26. You only own three spices: salt, pepper, and ketchup.
 27. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit
     over a snowsuit.
 28. You think sexy lingerie is tube socks and a flannel nightie.
 29. The local paper covers national and international
     headlines on one page, but requires six pages for sports.
 30. You think I-44 is spelled and pronounced "farty-far."
     (St. Louis only)
 31. You'll pay for your kids to go to college unless
     they want to go to KU.
 32. You think that deer season is a national holiday.
 33. You know that Concordia is halfway between Kansas City
     and Columbia, and Columbia is halfway between St. Louis
     and Kansas City, and the Warrenton outlet mall is
     halfway between Columbia and St. Louis.
 34. You can't think of anything better than sitting on the
     porch in the middle of the summer during a thunderstorm.
 35. You know which leaves make good toilet paper.
 36. You've said, "It's not the heat, it's the humidity."
 37. You know all four seasons: Almost Summer, Summer,
     Still Summer and Winter.
 38. You know if another Missourian is from the Bootheel,
     Ozarks, Eastern, Middle or Western Missouri soon as
     they open their mouth.
 39. You know that Harry S. Truman, Walt Disney and
     Mark Twain are all from Missouri.
 40. You failed world geography in school because you
     thought Cuba, Versailles, California, Nevada, Houston,
     Cabool, Louisiana, Springfield, Japan and Mexico were
     cities in Missouri. (And they are!)
 41. You think a traffic jam is ten cars waiting
     to pass a tractor.
 42. You know what "HOME OF THE THROWED ROLL" means !!!
 43. You actually get these jokes and forward them to all
     your Missouri friends !!

Top
Subj:    Wireless Parking In San Francisco (S682b,d)
         Produced by Good Magazine and IBM
         From: Wimp.com on 1/4/10 (in Cars-Supp2)
 Source1: http://www.wimp.com/futureparking/

 What if sensors on the street knew exactly which parking
 spots were free?  Your phone could direct you straight
 to a free space and the city could use that real-time
 information for dynamic meter pricing, discouraging
 driving when car traffic is too high.  San Francisco is
 already trying the idea.  If it works, it'll be good for
 motorists, for the city, and for the environment.

 Click 'HERE' to see this fascinating, new innovation
 in parking.

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Subj:     Where Do You Live? (S297b, S662b)
          From: coreymac on 10/11/2002
      and From: gattica30 on 9/18/2009

 You live in Phoenix, Arizona when..

 1. You are willing to park 3 blocks away because you found shade.
 2. You've experienced condensation on your butt
    from the hot water in the toilet bowl.
 3. You can drive for 4 hours in one direction
    and never leave town.
 4. You have over 100 recipes for Mexican food.
 5. You know that "dry heat" is comparable to what hits you
    in the face when you open your oven door.  The 4 seasons
    are: tolerable, hot, really hot, and ARE YOU KIDDING ME??!!

 You live in California when...

 1. You make over $250,000 and you still can't afford
    to buy a house.
 2. The high school quarterback calls a time-out
    to answer his cell phone.
 3. The fastest part of your commute is
    going down your driveway.
 4. You know how to eat an artichoke.
 5. You drive your rented Mercedes
    to your neighborhood block party.
 6. When someone asks you how far something is,
    you tell them how long it will take to get
    there rather than how many miles away it is.

 You live in New York City when...

 1. You say "the city" and expect everyone
    to know you mean Manhattan.
 2. You have never been to the Statue of Liberty
    or the Empire State Building.
 3. You can get into a four-hour argument about how
    to get from Columbus Circle to Battery Park, but
    can't find Wisconsin on a map.
 4. You think Central Park is "nature,"
 5. You believe that being able to swear at people
    in their own language makes you multi-lingual.
 6. You've worn out a car horn.
 7. You think eye contact is an act of aggression.

 You live in Maine when...

 1. You only have four spices: salt, pepper, ketchup,
    and Tabasco.
 2. Halloween costumes fit over parkas.
 3. You have more than one recipe for moose.
 4. Sexy lingerie is anything flannel with less
    than eight buttons.
 5. The four seasons are: winter, still winter,
    almost winter, and construction.

 You live in the Deep South when...

 1. You can rent a movie and buy bait in the same store.
 2."ya'll" is singular and "all ya'll" is plural.
 3. After five years you still hear, "You ain't from
    'round here, are Ya?"
 4. "He needed killin' " is a valid defense.
 5. Everyone has 2 first names: Billy Bob, Jimmy Bob,
    Mary Sue, Betty Jean, etc.

 You live in Colorado when...

 1. You carry your $3,000 mountain bike atop your $500 car.
 2. You tell your husband to pick up Granola on his way
    home and he stops at the day care center.
 3. A pass does not involve a football or dating.
 4. The top of your head is bald, but you still have a
    pony tail.

 You live in the Midwest when...

 1. You've never met any celebrities, but the mayor
    knows your name.
 2. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting
    to pass a tractor.
 3. You have had to switch from "heat" to "A/C"
    on the same day.
 4. You end sentences with a preposition:
    "Where's my coat at?"
 5. When asked how your trip was to any exotic place,
    you say, "It was different!"

 You live in Florida when...

 1. You eat dinner at 3:15 in the afternoon.
 2. All purchases include a coupon of some kind
    - even houses and cars.
 3. Everyone can recommend an excellent dermatologist.
 4. Road construction never ends anywhere in the state.
 5. Cars in front of you are often driven by headless people

Top
Subj:     I'm From Kentucky - Sign (S993)
          From: Linda Livers on Facebook on 1/7/2015
 Source: https://www.facebook.com/981TheBull/photos/a.135264599836
.........366.19566.111127745583385/986526004710217/?type=3&theater
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Subj:     Moved To Silicon Valley (S239b)
          From: gheckman on 8/26/2001

Dear Mom,

   January
   Moved to Silicon Valley for a job.
   My salary is 30% higher!
   I have stock options by the truckload!
   The temperature outside is 65F in winter!
   California is the best place on earth!!!

   February
   Still looking for an apartment.
   Freeways everywhere to take you places.
   Still love California!

   March
   Found a 1 bedroom apartment for $1900/mo.
   California is more expensive than I thought.
   Met nice girl down the hall -- think I'll ask
   her out.

   April
   Gas hit $2.89/gal.
   Somebody stole the gas from my car.
   Nice girl turned out to be guy...
   This sucks!!

   May
   A small earthquake!
   And this is what you were so worried about?
   Almost didn't feel it.

   June
   A forest fire and a mud slide near LA.
   Who cares, that is far away from me!

   July
   A big earthquake... Spent 4 hours in my bathtub.
   Boy, that was scary.
   We had no stinking earthquakes where I came from.

   August
   Drought! They turn on the water once a day.
   Somebody stole the water from my car's radiator.
   Why did I come to California?

   September
   Decided to buy a house. Found a 2-bedroom fixer-
   upper for $800K.
   Borrowed against my stock options for down payment.
   Freeway traffic is worse. Today it took nearly
   two hours, One way!

   October
   My startup fired 90% of the work force, including me.
   The stock lost 98% of its value.
   My options are underwater.

   November
   Had to sell the house. Couldn't make the payments.
   Found a studio apartment for $2300/mo.
   Traffic unbearable

   December
   Problems with electricity.
   They turn the electricity off several times a day. It's
   called "rolling blackouts."
   Who stole my car battery, and what do I do now?

   January
   I'm typing this, stuck in an elevator, in complete darkness.
   The battery of my laptop is dying.
   Silicon Valley is no more.
   Angry hordes of former dot-commers are looting in the dark.
   I'm coming back home.

Your loving son

Top
(S672)
     by John Graziano on 11/26/2009
 Source: http://www.gocomics.com/ripleysbelieveitornot/2009/11/26
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Subj:     You Know You're From California When... (S193, S540c)
          From: ICohen on 10/10/00
      and From: redcatt on 5/16/2007

  1. Your coworker has 8 body piercings and none are visible.
  2. You make over $300,000 and still can't afford a house.
  3. You take a bus and are shocked at two people carrying
     on a conversation in English.
  4. Your child's 3rd-grade teacher has purple hair, a nose
     ring, and is named Flower.
  5. You can't remember . . Is pot illegal?
  6. You've been to a baby shower that has two mothers and
     a sperm donor.
  7. You have a very string opinion about where your coffee
     beans are grown, and you can taste the difference between
     Sumatran and Ethiopian.
  8. You can't remember . . . Is pot illegal?
  9. A really great parking space can totally move you to tears.
 10. Gas costs $1.00 per gallon more than anywhere else in the U.S.
 11. Unlike back home, the guy at 8:30 am at Starbucks wearing
     a baseball cap  and sunglasses who looks like George Clooney
     really IS George Clooney.
 12. Your car insurance costs as much as your house payment.
 13. It's barely sprinkling rain and there's a report on every
     news station: "STORM WATCH."
 14. You pass an elementary school playground and the children
     are all busy with their cells or pagers.
 15. It's barely sprinkling rain outside, so you leave for work
     an hour early to avoid all the weather-related accidents.
 16. HEY!!!! Is pot illegal????
 17. Both you AND your dog have therapists, psychics, personal
     trainers and cosmetic surgeons.
 18. The Terminator is your governor.
 19. If you drive illegally, they take your driver's license.
     If you're here illegally, they want to give you one
 20. You pass an elementary school playground and the children
     are wearing bullet proof vest.

From: DR SWITZER on 98-02-04

 You know you're from California when...

 21. Your car has bulletproof windows.
 22. Left is right and right is wrong.
 23. Your monthly house payments exceed your annual income.
 24. Your mouse has only one ball.
 25. You need a new TV, you can run down to the local riot
     and pick one up.
 26. You dive under a desk whenever a large truck goes by.
 27. You can't find your other earring because your son
     is wearing it.
 28. You drive to your neighborhood block party.
 29. Your family tree contains significant others.
 30. Your cat has it's own psychiatrist.
 31. You don't exterminate your roaches, you smoke them.
 32. You see 25 lawyers chasing an ambulance.
 33. More than clothes come out of the closets.
 34. When "the Dead" are best live.
 35. You go to a tanning salon before going to the beach.
 36. Your blind date turns out to be your ex-spouse.
 37. More money is spent on facelifts than on diapers.
 38. Smoking in your office is not optional.
 39. You pack shorts and a T-shirt for skiing in the snow,
     and a sweater and a wetsuit for the beach.
 40. When you can't schedule a meeting because you must
     "do lunch".
 41. Your children learn to walk in Birkenstocks.
 42. Rainstorms or thunder are the lead story for the local news.
 43. You'll reluctantly miss yoga class to wait for the
     hottub repairman.
 44. You consult your horoscope before planning your day.
 45. A glass has been reserved for you at your favorite winery.
 46. When all highways into the state say: no fruits.
 47. All highways out of the state say:  Go back
 48. The fastest part of your commute is down your driveway.
 49. You were born somewhere else.
 50. You know how to eat an artichoke.
 51. The primary bugs that you worry about are electronic.

Top
Subj:     Crossing Streets In California (S545b)
          From: Mother Goose And Grimm
          Drawn by Mike Peters on 6/21/07
 Source: http://www.grimmy.com/comics.php
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Subj:     You Know You Live In SF When... (S44)
          From: auntieg on 97-11-29

 Your co-worker tells you he has eight body piercings -
    none are visible.
 When someone says "TENDERLOIN", you don't think steak;
    you think danger.
 You make well over $100,000 and you still can't find a
    nice place to live.
 A really great parking spot can move you to tears.
 You think anyone who drives a car to work is decadent.
 You keep a list of companies to boycott.
 You would never dream of crossing a picket line.
 You take the bus and are shocked at two people
    carrying on a conversation in English.
 You realize there are far more Rainbow flags in the city
    than the California State flag.
 The guy who cuts your hair is straight, and your
    plumber is gay.
 The woman who delivers your mail is straight,
    and your Mary Kay Lady is gay.
 Old friends you haven't talked to in years suddenly call.
    "Do you have a spare bedroom for a weekend?"
 You think anyone wearing a George Clooney haircut
    is visiting from the Midwest.
 You can't remember...Is pot still illegal?
 You go to your office manager's baby shower.
    The parents are named Judy and  Becky.
 You give a "thumbs up" gesture to a car with a
    FREE TIBET bumper sticker-and you mean it.
 You know that anyone wearing shorts in June is just
    visiting from Ohio.
 A man walks on MUNI in full leather regalia
    and crotch less chaps. You don't notice.
 You curse those damn tourists - but always stop to help
    a cute person who is looking puzzled at a city map.
 When you drive under an underpass, for one moment you
    think "earthquake".
 Your boss runs in "The Bay to Breakers"
    ....it's the first time you have seen him nude.
 You are thinking of taking an adult education class,
    but you can't decide between a Yoga, Channeling or
    Building Your Web Site class.
 Your new neighbors go to temple, but you
   are still not sure if they are Jewish or Buddhist.
 You realize the only Republicans you know
   are your Aunt and Uncle in Georgia.

From: Ossama's Laugh on 6/14/98
 You never bother looking at the MUNI line schedule because
    you know the drivers have never seen it.
 You've been to more than one baby shower
    that has two mothers and a sperm donor.
 You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee
    beans are grown and can taste the difference between
    Sumatra and Ethiopian.
 You assume every company offers domestic partner benefits.
 Your child's 3rd grade teacher has two pierced ears, a nose
    ring and is named "Breeze." And, after telling a friend,
    they still need to ask if the teacher is male or female.
 You haven't been to Fisherman's Wharf since the first month
    you moved to SF and you couldn't figure out how to drive
    to Coit Tower if your life depended on it.
 A woman walks on MUNI with live poultry. You don't notice.
 You know that any woman with a George Clooney haircut is
    not a tourist.

Top
Subj:     Ode To Mare Island Naval Shipyard (S971)
          From: Jon Pasco on Facebook
 Source: https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10205973
.........318844962?set=gm.1001938829828074?type=1?theater
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..........
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..........This poem was published in one of the last
..........issues of the Grapevines, the newspaper for
..........Mare Island.  Click 'HERE' to read it.
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Subj:     Short California Facts
 

Top
Subj:     How To Pronounce Oklahoma (S610c)
          From: rfslick on 9/16/2008
Photo from CVDavis.BlogSpot.com...
 I guess I had been pronouncing it correctly all along,
 but I never knew the story behind it.  There is a right
 way and a wrong way to pronounce Oklahoma.

 The proper way is: Okla . . . Homa (There's a pause
 between the 'a' and the 'h'.) To see the reason, click 'HERE'.
 

Top
Subj:     Back In 1850 (S447b, S637c)
          From: RFSlick on 8/25/2005
      and From: tom on 3/22/2009
 Do you know what happened this week back in 1850?
 California became a state.
 The state had no electricity.
 The state had no money.
 Almost everyone spoke Spanish.
 There were gun fights in the middle of the streets.
 So it was just like California today, except the women
    had real breasts
 

Top
Subj:     Bawstin (S573c)
          From: tom on 1/8/2008
Photo from Yahoo! Images
 This information on Boston and the surrounding area is
 quite cute.  Click 'HERE' to read about Beantown.
 

Top
Subj:     California's New State Seal (S358)
          From: CHRISDADDYG on 12/11/2003
 This is so good, you have to see California's new State Seal.
 Click 'Here' to see it.
 
 

The San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile National Monuments
 

From: auntieg 98-05-09
 Los Angeles's full name is "El Pueblo de Nuestra Senora
 la Reina de los Angeles de Porciuncula." It can be abbreviated
 to 3.63% of its size, "L.A."

 The Chico, California, City Council enacted a ban on
 nuclear weapons, setting a $500 fine for anyone
 detonating one within city limits.

From NBC News on 7/6/00 (S179)
 The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco.
 -- Mark Twain

For more Twain quotes see 'Twain on Government' in POLITICAL2.
 

From: Robert P. on 10/12/03 (S350b)
 Q: Did you hear about the woman in San Francisco who was
    walking down the street and was attacked by three men?
 A: Two held her down while the other did her hair.

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..........................From Smiley_Central
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